MuSic aDDicT

it's a new day.. finally updating~

2009-03-17T18:14:00.002+08:00

omg i've finally updated my songs~! after 3 months of being stagnant~ lololololol

ooh. btw.
my mum n my sis just came here few days ago. i mean. it's sooo nice of them XD
we went 2 vivo on sat.. then we spent the last 1,5hours at starbucks trying 2 go online. haahaa LOL
the next day (which is a sun), we went 2 chinatown, buy perfume at THAT shop at 2nd floor which sells perfume at cheap prices! woohooo (: so nice. hahaha and i noe dat it's original, so i'd call it consumer advantage. muahahaha loool~ not exactly.
then we went to...ermm ikea at alexandra road...then far east plaza, then back to orchard..
hmm this time round my mum didnt shop at all (compared to wat she usually did when she came to singapore, this is called de-shopping!) hahaha..
ended the day just wandering around orchard road againnn... (: at taka there. yeapps. hahah

thennnn last day, we just walked ard orchard, buy things 4 my sis' friends.. my helpers... wdv, just lotsa lotsa people (:

haihss then they sent me back to The Dreary Parry Hall T_____T which set up lotsa unreasonable rules.... including the earning of permission to stay out. woah. we had to get our parents to come down 2 e hostel, then write a letter on the spot, showing their i/c and PASSPORT etc..just to get me outta here for 2 nights..-___- please la. i mean, one cant be any lamer.. >,< it's not like we're brave enough to run away frm singapore without permission..
and it's not like we dunno the rules and the limits to our ....wat we called adolescent behaviour..
i dunno why they always treat us like primary school kids. like we dun understand the ethic codes. like we dun understand the danger of smoking (can u imagine urself being lectured abt how you cannot smoke in the hostel..?) ...

ohno
i'm gettin paranoid. hahaha XD neways. yea. it was fun(: i'm realli looking forward 2 going back to indo during june holidays!!!!!

...
n gettin outta this hostel, soon. hahaha(: the hostel's not that bad. but maybe the hostel environment is just ...unbelievable. haha

yeapps.

i think i just found the blogging mood today~ lol.

lol random~

2009-03-08T22:57:00.002+08:00

oooo i havent blogged for so long! (:
basically i just wanna greet THE AMANDA THE BEST for making me have to post something on this rotten blog!! somehow she made me feel like blogging...hmm
i wonder if it's cuz of the bimbo nature of her that's able to make ppl more enthu.tsk.like last tym orientation she n rachelle n sherry(is dis correct?) n..gank. lol cheered damn loud (hmm...even louder than some of the ogls. haha) that they made evryone cheered tgt...
THE BIMBO GANK. HIHIHIHIHI =P

ok.
basically i have
ermmm
kinda nth 2 talk abt. im nt realli in the mood of talking abt the crosscountry ytd..

i just knew that i got alot of sms n IMs saying "it's ok" "there must be somethin u can learn frm this" and..."just postpone the event la. do it anotha time(:"

swells. then i knew i went online frm 3pm til 1am. dat was kinda random tho.
I guess it's time to let go of it.
all the frowns and downs, i'll bear with it.
i'll just enjoy what i have today
and you're gonna see me there visiting you someday.
i think so (:
just fly(:

hmm...quite positive ey..?
thanks to...myself!! (not amanda seow) hahahah
lol
basically. im writing this random thing cuz i feel like being random now.
just like how i am random everyday.
and randomly. i think i wrote this random post to some random person, which is my random exco junior, who randomly talked about me and blogging and some other random pretty stuff like my random doggie =p

hope this random post will give you enough 'randomness' already (:
hahahha (you know who you are) lol.

i'm already mising you.

2009-02-14T01:19:00.003+08:00

k. guess what.
i've been OGL-ing the past one week. too tired to even bother to go online~ hahaha

...
i'm in a random mode
emo mode..
i dunno.
lol.

but i know i'm missing you already (:
why din you call. why din you keep me at least updated.
why did i have to hear about you from other people.

its like these question kept boggling my mind.

do u still feel the same?
do u still even care?
ahh...think i cannot take it.how will our friendship go? >,<

The sky has lost its color
The sun has turned to gray
At least that’s how it feels to me
Whenever you’re away
I crawl up in the corner
To watch the minutes pass
Each one brings me closer to
The time you’re coming back

I can’t take the distance
I can’t take the miles
I can’t take the time until I next see you smile
I can’t take the distance
And I’m not ashamed
That with every breath I take I’m calling your name
I can’t take the distance

I still believe my feelings
But sometimes I feel too much
I make believe you’re close to me
But it ain’t close enough
Not nearly close enough

I’d breathe fire and I’d be free
To be by your side, I’d do anything
I can’t take the distance

I will go the distance
I will go the miles
That’s how much you mean to me

I can’t take the distance
I can’t take these miles
I can’t take the time until I next see you smile
I can’t take the distance
And I’m not ashamed
That with every breath I take I’m calling your name
I can’t take the distance

viva la holiday~

2008-11-30T17:10:00.002+08:00

(: i havent blogged for quite some while. lol~
hmmm holidays.
i've been mailing know(: yea of course, tho she may not have replied the latest one very quick since she's busy doing her his assignment. hahaha

thennn errmm i was helpin my mum w my bro's concert n so glad dat it turned out realli well(: and i jux rmb dat he's actually kinda old alr. hahaha dat there r still lotsa ppl fancy him... it's realli a blessing(: he shud thank God for that=D

tmr. i'll be having lintang, dodol tracey n hani stayin over at my house for almost a week. they said (or maybe it's more accurate if i say, tracey said.. haha) she wants to do food hunt:D well yea. fun yea. broke, yea too. hhahaha

soooo.. i've got this long list of the places we shud visit=D i think we'll enjoy this vacation. we'll certainly enjoy it, i guess. hahaha

o.o speakin abt my house. (twisting eyes) i'm proud to say dat my house just won this exterior house competition by one of the interior/exterior house arrangement magz. haha
i'm kinda proud of it, tho i aint half as proud as my mum. i think. lalala~

sooo yea...
happy holidays!!!
1 n a half months to sch!!! T____________________T

i think i will miss you.

maybe goodbye

2008-11-17T17:21:00.003+08:00

dedicated to Tracey
don't forget me yea?(:

Maybe Goodbye
10 Nov 08
music & lyrics by Jessica Ardelia

So we're just sitting down here, staring and wondering
what will it be like, when the clock strikes two
and there comes the time, we separate, me and you

It may be a good thing, it may be bad
You sound so good, and I feel sad
I just can't figure out, how to forget all the moments that we've had

But now i'm reminded again, not to make it complicated
Have a faith in our hearts, and believe inside
We're connected, and we'll go afar

Now it's just me and you, thinking of the good times we had when you
and I, we're walking side by side
Maybe goodbye isn't just a fate we've figured out
Maybe it brings good for us too
So don't you cry (we're not to cry)
By the time we meet again, we'll be going through our lives halfway
I'll still love you all the way

Now there's this film of our memories
It's playing in my mind, like an old movie
Yea, you were mean to me,
can't you see?

I sometimes said bad things about you,
about how i kept giving in for you
without realising, many other things that you do
I'm sorry

Now it's just me and you, thinking of the good times we had when you
and I, we're walking side by side
Maybe goodbye isn't just a fate we've figured out
Maybe it brings good for us too
So don't you cry (we're not to cry)
By the time we meet again, we'll be going through our lives halfway
I'll still love you all the way

It's time when we tell each other
about what we think and another
you may not have another chance, in a glance
but i know we'll meet again,someday.

Now it's just me and you, thinking of the good times we had when you
and I, we're walking side by side
Maybe goodbye isn't just a fate we've figured out
Maybe it brings good for us too
So don't you cry (we're not to cry)
By the time we meet again, we'll be going through our lives halfway
I'll still love you all the way

that was my new song.. (tryin to remember)..hmm.. dat makes this my 8th real song=p after
October 11th, I'm 4 myself, Now You Can Say A Word, Mystery I'm Missing, Reminiscing, My Guardian Angel (dedicated to Regina n Bernadet), Slow Walk...

back. down.

2008-11-10T17:17:00.002+08:00

hey! i jux realised i hvnt blogged 4 quite some time. haha hmm but yea. k kays.
jux to update my routines...
hmmmm
i got ABCDE 4 my overall results! haha quite cool huh?!?!?! =p
A(maths) B(chem) C(econs..hmmm~) D(phy OMG!!!) E(GP..haha i think i shud've failed by right.)
hahaha
k. i cnt b said dat im happy or satisfied. but at least it was enuf 2 make me stay in singapore
and yea
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER THE TWO OF YOU WILL EVER READ THIS.
BUT THIS IS DEDICATED TO TWO OF MY BEST FRIENDS.

eternal friendship:
"when distance separates us, we will learn how to respect the time we will spend"

i feel like i took part in letting you down
but if you're really happy about it, sincerely happy about it,
i'll just support you
this may be the best for you, what God has planned for us
i'll just say, be strong. adjust quick to this fate, and quickly adapt to it. i'm really sure you'll do fine(: i have a faith in you.
and i'm actually really proud to have such friends like you
i really love you guys. really.
yea
but if only i can tell you the truth
the truth is, it's actually me who should adjust to this fate
i really can't imagine my life next year
i may be mugging really hard to fill my spare time missing you guys
i may be tapping out a lot for my phone bill cause i keep calling you guys (well. phone chat can be quite cheap these days)
hahaha
i don't know. i really have no idea

but i want you to know
wherever you are
i'll still be right here for you
you'll still have a friend to share
i've told you. you're my friend for life. and i mean it(:
i sincerely do. and i'll always mean it.
whatever it is, if it's for the best of you

i'll just stand around you.
in front of you, to help you find a way when you're lost
beside you, to give you a hand to hold onto wherever you're walking to.
behind you, to push you through. and this time, i won't let you down

i'm just a human. i ain't perfect.
neither am i a superhuman.
and i don't have anything to offer you,
beside that i love you. and you can count on me.
friends til our time comes(:

all the best(:

exam's over!!!!

2008-10-12T08:19:00.003+08:00

exam's over.
hahaha
O.o im goin back to indo on 16 nov!!!~ hahahhahaa n wil b back in sg on 11jan..
hahah
now dat reminds me of the song, 11januari... so sweet...=D haha

O.o what else cn i say..?
i've been busy downloading songs...watching movies...
well
pw maybe~

O.o n i was soooooooooooo sosososososo happy ytd...~ i cnt tell y'all... but yea.=D

hahahaha

hmmm
post-exam plans:
jurong birdpark (again)! haha
ice skating!!
shopping (done!!!)
hmhmhm jamming!!!
holland v!!!
betty n veronica!!!
organise files in e walkman!!!

haahahaha happy holidays n pw!! haha

song...?

2008-09-27T08:18:00.003+08:00

i'd never thought I would meet someone like you
and it feels so right, it feels so right
and I can't find a reason just to hate you
and I feel so fine, oh I feel so fine

Even though you never said you like me so
I'm still here to catch up with your pace
and even though you put me up on a test
Oh friend, to me you're still the best

If you come near my way
Don't forget that someday
I'll be your angel and make things okay
If you ever feel blue
I'll be near and stay true
I'll give you my arms to lean, just come here
But one question of how I feel
Can you love me like i you?

I think what you did might have been too much
Don't expect me to always look all right
So i'll try harder to feel good inside
so i'll try, and so i'll try

oh please let's make this work together
and get a grip and let's be better
i will change if you need me to
and i'm so glad that i've got you

if you come near my way
don't forget that someday
i'll be your angel and make things okay
if you ever feel blue
i'll be near and stay true
i'll give you my arms to lean, just come here
but there's one question of how i feel
can you love me like i you?

it hurts the most when i smile.

2008-09-19T22:53:00.002+08:00

it's been kinda weird.
i havent been acting like myself recently
maybe i was stressed.
maybe i 've been thinking too much of my expectations lately.

but anyways.

i've always knew i gotta get back
fill in the holes where i lack
and never feel blue anymore
cuz pain is just too sore.

oh gosh. with my abnormal self i felt even more mad when i met you
i guess you never saw it through.
or did you..?
well it's just a heart
torn heart. broken apart.

you've always said its just me who's too sensitive
i think it actually worked both ways, you were too insensitive too.
good match ey? it's just too coincidental that i met some1 who can easily
took me that easy
hahaha when you asked me to leave.
well, you did. and every time you did, i felt like some dirt you humans need to brush off
or maybe i should just take off
leave this island of sadness.

i should just don't care about it already.
BUT YOU KNOW IT'S NOT EASY.

i've been trying to, pal
you know i don't want to feel anymore pal.

i'll REALLY BLEED to move on
yea. from now on
IT TAKES MORE THAN ME THOUGH
i hope you'll always remind me to

and i'll just try, when i meet you again i'll look okay.
but honestly
it just hurts when i smile.
and it hurts the most when i smile.

promos fever!!!

2008-09-11T22:52:00.001+08:00

IM STRESSED!!!
STRESSED!
STRESSED!!!!

HAHAHA
BTW. I GOT ONE NEW SONG EY.
BUT NO TIME TO TYPE. HAHAHA
IM DOIN MY 5 ECONS ESSAY AND 4 CASE STUDIES QUESTIONS
DUE TOMORROW!!!

siao!
SMART ECONS TEACHER!!!

aaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhh
jiayou me kays!!! im running outta time!!!!

time to study. again.
LOL.

just past twelve then.

2008-08-26T21:00:00.002+08:00

now that everything's been said.
everythin's been discussed.
i shouldnt feel sad anymore.
should i not..?

yea i shouldnt
even if the final was kinda hurtful.

but yes.
that yearly-repeated day of yours. that night.
just past twelve we talked.
and past then we cried.
of why everythin must went this way.

u felt cruel, but i said u shudn't
well. it's true.
i said, there's nothin wrong with what had happened earlier.
well. it's true. too.
and we shouldnt regret it.
we shouldn't.
but there's this feelin inside me that kept bleeding
it kept repeating
kept hurting
kept screaming inside
..

i dunno.
where did i go wrong..?
after years i've come along.
and tho i still remember how we sang those songs.
it was a long, long time of longing

i've found out one thing about myself.
i've found out about loving people without expecting anything in return.

BUT IT'S HARD.

i don't know what im doing now.
've been procrastinating enough.
now i gotta get up.
face up this life.
and look up.
take out this knife.

aaahh
im just gonna live.

hope you ever read this blog.

guess what.

2008-08-16T09:24:00.002+08:00

omg. susi was super irritating dis morning!!!!

still here

2008-08-16T08:22:00.003+08:00

i feel uncertain

i never know what you want.
seems like you're pulling me near, then pushing me away again
and all your expressions
i can tell the difference
when you loved me and you don't anymore.
or cant i..?
am i that blind..?

oh please can you give me some light?
i'm tired of being alone.
it's like, having no one elso to hold onto.
i want to be independent
but im still human
i just hope i don't go off limits.

this whole frenship thing is killin me.
why would you not care
or was i wrong at the first time....
that u did care for me last time
never care for me even once...?
i don't know.
i just feel so uncertain

now i don't know what i'm gonna do
i don't know how too see
i don' tknow how to smile when i don't want to
i don't know how to face you.

and your new friend.

still shadowing me very clearly the memories of the past times
when you were near.
now evrything's changed.
i'll remain stationary.
and love you like before.
thanks for being my best friend. you still are.
i hope you knew it.
that it aint take short time to let the stains evaporate into thin air.
until then.

when you need me, just come here.
i'll be just still.

The Trouble With Love Is

2008-08-15T20:32:00.002+08:00

Love can be a many splendored thing

Can't deny the joy it brings

A dozen roses, diamond rings

Dreams for sale and fairy tales

It'll make you hear a symphony

And you just want the world to see

But like a drug that makes you blind,

It'll fool ya every time

The trouble with love is

It can tear you up inside

Make your heart believe a lie

It's stronger than your pride

The trouble with love is

It doesn't care how fast you fall

And you can't refuse the call

See, you got no say at all

Now I was once a fool, it's true

I played the game by all the rules

But now my world's a deeper blue

I'm sadder, but I'm wiser tooI swore I'd never love again

I swore my heart would never mend

Said love wasn't worth the pain

But then I hear it call my name(The trouble with)

The trouble with love isIt can tear you up inside

Make your heart believe a lie

It's stronger than your pride

The trouble with love is

It doesn't care how fast you fall

And you can't refuse the call

See, you got no say at all

Every time I turn around

I think I've got it all figured out

My heart keeps callin' and I keep on fallin'

Over and over again

This sad story always ends the same

Me standin' in the pourin' rainIt seems no matter what I do

It tears my heart in two

bored..

2008-07-23T12:25:00.000+08:00

well
5 min to pw tutorial!~ n gracia kept sayin i nv update my blog...~

GRACIA!!!! I AM UPDATING MY BLOG NOW!~ HAHAHAHA

a post after so long.

2008-06-02T02:24:00.003+08:00

i hvnt blogged 4 so long. lol. now i miss blogging yea. myb cuz i jux had nth to do practically at this time of the night (lol~ its 2.30am now n evry1 ard me is asleep)

LOL AND THE RANDOMNESS BEGINS

feelin' blue.
have been tryin not to, and i failed
cuz i think i miss you, too much
too much

never thought that i would feel the loneliness
when you're gone
the loneliness
when listening to the music all alone

not having you around me
you,who always disturbed my privacy

my guardian angel~

2008-02-02T13:04:00.000+08:00

hey ho!
i got a new song again!:)

My Guardian Angel
dedicated to: Regina and Bernadet:)

Smile like and angel
breakin through my soul oh
when you were here
i felt like saved by you
you're the rescuer of my soul

when i am fallen
you strech your hands out oh
catching me
guiding me through the night
and you're always by my side

and somehow we're like women and men
and somehow we're like the best of friends
and so now i'd like to tell you i...

can fly high with your wings, touch the sky cuz of your smile
cuz you're my guardian angel, my guardian angel, brighten up my darkest night
now i can see my life, more from the good side
thanks to you guardian angel, my guardian angel
you always bring the best to my life

now i am stronger
because of your support
tellin me
that i can achieve more, yeah!
i owe it all to you

so here i stand
wanting you hear this song
about you
to show my gratitude
and tell you that i love you so

and somehow we're like women and men
and somehow we're like the best of friends
and so now i'd like to tell you i...

can fly high with your wings, touch the sky cuz of your smile
cuz you're my guardian angel, my guardian angel, brighten up my darkest night
now i can see my life, more from the good side
thanks to you guardian angel, my guardian angel
you always bring the best to my life

i thank God for bringing you here
into my life
be better my days
and may we really be best of friends
so i'd like to tell you i...

can fly high with your wings, touch the sky cuz of your smile
cuz you're my guardian angel, my guardian angel, brighten up my darkest night
now i can see my life, more from the good side
thanks to you guardian angel, my guardian angel
you always bring the best to my life

can fly high with your wings, touch the sky cuz of your smile
cuz you're my guardian angel, my guardian angel, brighten up my darkest night
now i can see my life, more from the good side
thanks to you guardian angel, my guardian angel
you always bring the best to my life

oo.. guardian angel,
thanks to you guardian angel
my guardian angel

you always bring the best to my life

thanks rere n nadet:)
i love you all:)

mystery i'm missing

2007-09-28T13:06:00.000+08:00

heyho!!! it's a new song i just wrote, 19sept07 during ms Suzan Tee's class..=p
entitled MYSTERY I'M MISSING

it's about me, myself and i. just to let others know, and it's based on myself.
k**w, it's also for you='(
and whoever sees it, dun 4get to comment after reading this.=p thanks!

all the days go by and seasons changing
tears when i cried, i kept on wiping
though i still smiled, you could tell
my heart
bleeding

for once i tried, and i felt i might
come back here again leaving all this pain
the loneliness brought by the wind
revealed the things unseen

the greatest me i could achieve
the greatest buy i'm having here
but i still need more, much more than me

[chorus]
a search of a soul after a fall
i'm telling myself, 'i need a friend' but who would care?
i cannot bare
the pain inside my heart, you used to tear
will there be a love, even in my world?
the thirst of one's saying 'i love you' but who would know?
oh please, save me from this game
it's a mystery i'm missing

i've spent some years without a friend
walking alone, no one lends a hand
though i could fly, on my own i've tried
why did i still cry?

[chorus]
a search of a soul after a fall
i'm telling myself, 'i need a friend' but who would care?
i cannot bare
the pain inside my heart, you used to tear
will there be a love, even in my world?
the thirst of one's saying 'i love you' but who would know?
oh please, save me from this game
it's a mystery i'm missing

the greatest me i could achieve
the greatest buy i'm having here
but i still need more, much more than me

i wanna be what i wanna be
i wanna see what i wanna see
but not alone, not only me

a search of a soul after a fall
i'm telling myself 'i need a friend' but who would care?
oh i cannot bare....

a search of a soul after a fall
i'm telling myself, 'i need a friend' but who would care?
i cannot bare
the pain inside my heart, you used to tear
will there be a love, even in my world?
the thirst of one's saying 'i love you' but who would know?
oh please, save me from this game
please save me from this game
oh, please save me from this game

it's a mystery i'm missing...

yepp. that's it.
pls do comment on it=)

exam fever... prelims madness!!! im like a falling meteor..

2007-08-15T13:06:00.000+08:00

i'm like a falling meteor..

been travellin ard e universe..
its a milkyway, e beauty its all hers..=)

then when i saw a dot from far..
i knew exactly that it's a star..
that's sun!!!
excitedly i went off.. took a run
to observe from nearer distance
the beauty of wat i saw for an instance..

and as i was approaching this wonderful, bright star
unexpectedly, spontaneously
i felt there was a strong energy
overwhelmed me..
pulled me to sightsee
anotha creation of the universe's mermory
its the earth..
to all my nerve!!
its beautiful...
the blue ocean n the white cotton-like clouds..
thats the earth my friends hav been talking about..

well, lets stop that crap..
this energy, it made me trapped...
i was so shocked, i tried to run away
its just a determination..
n i knew to all my fear, for all i did i just hadnt a confident
enclosed by the agitations
isolated from succeeding in my independence..

ohmy.. i crashed 2 the earth
making a hole dats narrow
causing the people's howls and sorrows..
if i could turn back the time
i would try to control wat's mine
i was crushed
broken into pieces..
n i made others were too..

but after all this, i realised
i had to try
as hard as i could, as determined as i could
with all my desire to move on i would...
when i died dat day...
seemed like i had undergone some reincarnation
yea..i received a salvation
when i woke up, i found myself running in a great speed
dashing over the universe
for this time,

when i feel that the gravity
tries to kill me again
i'll live
i'll just live
no wonder how hard i gotta try
i just know that i'll fly

songs

2007-07-22T21:44:00.000+08:00

ehhh... check out this songs yo~

superman - five for fighting
follow through - gavin de graw
best i've ever had (grey sky morning) - vertical horison
your guardian angel - red jumpsuit apparatus
broken - seether ft. amy lee
don't speak - no doubt
this is home truly...blahblah...
where i belong - tanya chua
we wil get there - stephanie sun

waddoyathink..??XP

...hey tomorrow, wait for me..=)

2007-06-28T18:16:00.000+08:00

now this is just a reality...

and yes, thinking of my capability..

doin this work, this endless road wif all these troubles..

i can do nothing but mumble...

...

well, sometimes u just think
when u start to do ur routines
it seems like u've just woken up
from ur sweet night dreams, and uve got to start to grow up

its kinda tiring though..
too many important things to cram... school? ur life?? well, both..

sometimes i just wanna run away..
fly high in this blue sky..
so i can forget all these dreary days..
n have myself a happy takeaways..

if someone ask you
of what u would want to do

well, its as simple as this..

to have myself away from all these problems in my life
to have a peaceful life
and fly.. just fly...

so imaginary..

and now, that ive got back to my life..
and these responsibilities i can never divide..
i'll just live
yeahh.. just live...

breathe the oxygen in the air
have myself strong, wif these troubles i had to bear
or else i couldnt live.. this life i have no spare..

now, i wake up again
get off my bed n have myself no more insane
maybe its even better if i could get my vain.. haha
nah, just kidding..
i shall take my train..
leaving this whole blue and rise again..
from the death, from the grave, and the disgrace...

now i'll try
i'll strive
i'll stop the tears and the cry
and on this greenlands, i would lie..
have the sun shines all over my skin
marking me that this is just a new begin

i shouted, as lively as i can..
as beautifully as these birds can chirps..

and now, i'd like to say,
hey tomorrow, wait for me.=)

indo indon indo

2007-06-07T21:26:00.000+08:00

songs to check out:
your guardian angel - red jumpsuit apparatus
best i ever had (grey sky morning) - vertical horizon
superman - five for fighting
follow through - gavin de graw

hahahhaa

2 more songs to go 4 e band thingy!!!=)

and 19 hours to go to changi airport!!! hahahha
i'll miss ya singapore!!!
especially my cham2 lynette jackie sherlyn....=)

n my eeeyuck hostel food n the uncle's not nice fried rice
hahaha

but nvm.. i'll have my mum's cooking!its the best in the world siaaa!!!!!! hahaha

3 days..

2007-06-05T21:50:00.001+08:00

3 days to go~!!!!!

well, lets list out what im gonna do in indo...:
1) exercise.. alot!!!!XD slim down.. hahaha XP
2) well, anotha exercise.. which is forced to do, by the constraints of human's.. the limitations caused by o levels and prelims.. if u get what i mean.. hahahahhh
3) shopping!!!!XD alamakkk... i want to update my wardrobe!! hahaha hopefully i can get some stuff there..=)
4) service my notebook!!! darn it.. got viruses!!!
5) buy comics!!! hahahahh
6) not to forget.. EAT GOOD FOOD!! XD well, its a bit contradictory wif no.1) i guess... hahaha nvm...
7) swim!! i mean, go swimming!! hahaha
8) sleep... not to forget.. wif melsy beside me.. hahaha XD
9) last but not the least...
pirated dvd!!!!!XD

omgomgomgomg
lotsa things to do hor...XD

toys story

2007-05-30T11:49:00.000+08:00

sadddd song...>< >< ><
taken frm toys story.. haha i just found the song last nite..
its abt the toy.. watshername..? jean? jane..? jenny?? ahh.. i dunno, 4got..
hahahs but sure, it's so sad...
*sobs
*teary eyed..
haha
no la.. so cliche..xp

entitled: when she loved me

When somebody loved me,
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart
And when she was sad,
I was there to dry her tears
And when she was happy,
So was I
When she loved me

Through the summer and the fall
We had each other, that was all
Just she and I together,
Like it was meant to be

And when she was lonely,
I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me

So the years went by
I stayed the same
But she began to drift away
I was left alone
Still I waited for the day
When she'd say I will always love you

Lonely and forgotten,
I'd never thought she'd look my way
And she smiled at me and held me just like she used to do
Like she loved me
When she loved me

When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart

When she loved me

anotha song..xp
mariah carey-without you

No I cant forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess thats just the way
The story goes
You always smile but in your eyes
Your sorrow shows
Yes it shows
No I cant forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrow
When I had you there
But then I let you go
And now its only fair
That I should let you know
What you should know

I cant live
If living is without you
I cant live
I cant give anymore
I cant live
If living is without you
I cant give
I cant give anymore

well, its just a new day..

2007-05-28T14:04:00.000+08:00

the new day..
and guess what, the time's just went away
maybe it's the time to say
that i'm happy now

well its not the same anymore
things change, always and evermore
yeah, when you're hurt and your heart tore
and pain inside here getting sore

you know what
i found something about life
when you're sad, or desperate
there's this something inside you that will light
up and make everything bright

when you're down
and it seems like you're breaking down
you feel not loved
and not cared by people around
with no way out
you'll soon have things to think carefully about

and you can actually break free
fly free to the world that you still dont know
be whatever you want to be
and just dont forget the past that you did not like, no
cuz you'll learn how to detach your bad feelings
replace them with the good
dont forget it, say to yourself, a loser not me
and so you'll get to face the problems, pass the wall that forbid you from the outside world
when you cant pass it, try to climb it
when you cant climb it, break it

do anything you can do
go over the limit that constrains you
you know what, you can
as long as you breathe, you can

and its just a new day

you'll see the sunlight above you
shining again, from the tiniest hole it shines through
it cures your heart, and that's true
that your limit is no longer your foo

dont give up
and dont ever escape from this life

maybe you havent a friend
maybe you havent a helping hand
you gotta know
that inside here, you've a star
shines like the newly-polished car
and just like those night club discos and bar
believe the world is great and so you are

im sure you'll find a way
to do a breakthrough and get a stand to say
it's a motivation
and your so-called inspiration
go into you to give you the lanterns
to lead your way through this darkness

go out and reach out
raise ur hands up in the sky
look for the star that shines
look for the sun that shines
look for the hope that comes
out between those cries and pains
those fears that will give you no gains

don't see them again
ever, again
no

soon you'll find
yourself on the right line
and the people who are kind
and these are your good signs

that you're going to have back your life
and you're going to survive

so go beyond your limit
have that confidence that will give you the new heartbeats

you can, as long as you try
and no more cries

you dont believe me, then just give it a one last try

at least, soon you'll get to see a new day...
well, it's just, what we called it
a new day

half-life

2007-05-28T13:58:00.000+08:00

HALF LIFE - Duncan Sheik

I'm awake in the afternoon
I fell asleep in the living room
and it's one of those moments
when everything is so clear

before the truth goes back into hiding
I want to decide 'cause it's worth deciding
to work on finding something more than this fear

It takes so much out of me to pretend
tell me now, tell me how to make amends

maybe, I need to see the daylight
to leave behind this half-life
don't you see I'm breaking down
lately, something here don't feel right
this is just a half-life
is there really no escape?
no escape from time
of any kind

I keep trying to understand
this thing and that thing, my fellow man
I guess I'll let you know
when i figure it out

but I don't mind a few mysteries
they can stay that way it's fine by me
and you are another mystery i am missing

It takes so much out of me to pretend

maybe, I need to see the daylight
to leave behind this half-life
don't you see I'm breaking down

Lately, something here don't feel right
this is just a half-life
is there really no escape?
no escape from time
of any kind

come on lets fall in love
come on lets fall in love
come on lets fall in love
again

'cause lately something here don't feel right
this is just a half-life,
without you I am breaking down

wake me, let me see the daylight
save me from this half-life
let's you and I escape
escape from time

sweet song

2007-05-24T18:42:00.000+08:00

i've been living with a shadow overhead
i've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
i've been lonely for so long
dragged in the past, i can't seem to move on

i've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
just in case i'll ever need them again someday
i've been setting aside time
to clear a little space in the corners of my mind

all i wanna do is find a way back into love
i can make it through without a way back into love

i've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
i've been searching but i just don't see the signs
i know that it's out there
there's gotta be somthing for my soul somewhere

i've been looking for someone to shed some light
not somebody just to get me through the night
i could use some direction
and i'm open to your suggestions

and if i open my heart again
i guess i'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end

there are moments when i don't know if it's real
or if anybody feels the way i feel
i need inspiration
not just another negotiation

all i wanna do is find a way back into love
i can't make it through without a way back into love

=)

2007-05-23T19:07:00.000+08:00

smile!

hey

2007-05-22T20:05:00.000+08:00

now i gotta get going with my own life
maybe its the best so i can have my goal
maybe i shall leave some pasts behind, and just move on
maybe i shall leave some parts of me behing and just go on

while evrybody is doin work..
dealing with things in their life
better their lives

should i do the same thing..?
they have their lives
so do i
so do you

well, myb i should just start doing what i ought to do
here
in my life here
studying..?

i just cant get over it..

the loneliness
the darkness

i shall try
try to get over this feeling
this bad feeling that had caused me to think that way

thanks for evrything

gosh
i think im tired of the word 'understand'
myb i just dont 'understand' what 'understand' really means
hahahahhh

...

2007-05-22T19:42:00.000+08:00

what's the point of coming if you'll still walk away?
what's the point of talking if you're not gonna have a chance to say?

listen

that's what i thought
well its not right, yet not completely wrong
it's just a time when we all trying not to move along
when we're trying to relieve our pains that cannot be healed
cuz of our fear that you'd be disappointed

but maybe i should change my mind
and help myself so i'll be no more blind

all these times, i realise
that i'll still learn, tho i lost my eyesight
tho ive got hurt
crushed.. and burnt

i'll still learn something
how to overcome this feeling
and there, i have to say one thing
i think i'll just need to give a smile to that, whatever happened in our lives..anything good, or bad...

we're all human being

..you know what... i hate it (part II)

2007-05-20T18:48:00.000+08:00

...(continuation from the previous post)

i hate it

another day
another time
i met you
on the day in the blue
and again

i said hi
and what did you say? goodbye..

i hate it

do you ever know that this is no joke
do you ever know that what i feel is no lie

and so i dont like it..
when you ignored me..can i ask you why?

am i so over-reacting..?
im sorry, i just cant get my head cooling..

you know that i hate it...

im crushed
broken into pieces
it's that im stressed
yet depressed
of whaterver goin on my life now
and please, i dont want you to go

walk away

like the other day

i hate it..

am i that horrible..?
like a dark phantom watching over you in the air..?
am i trying too hard to have a friend..?
like the effort when you're burned by the heat you couldnt bear..?

am i..?

i just hate it..

and you know what
i always hate it...
when you seemed so nice, giving me a hand
and just left me in my own land..

i hate it...

and yet
im figuring it out..
what everything is about..

im questioning it...
here inside my mind..

you know what..
i hate it...

you know what.. i hate it..

2007-05-19T16:07:00.000+08:00

i hate it..

walking along the road.. at night..
silence...
im looking for you..shed some light..
but ignorance...

ive been waiting for you

pls dont tell me that youre now my foo

after helping me wif the problems ive been going through

thx for coming, then you left me in the blue

i hate it...

when i said hi
and you didnt reply
when i sent you a smile
what i got was only a lie
when you did this, did you realise..?
im waiting for you to hold me tight..
again...
and erase this pain
please do

i hate it...
when i felt like having a second chance
and yet, i actually had a difficult task
to believe in you again
to believe in friends again

please tell me
i cant stand it
all the uncertainty...dont ask me to repeat
i want someone to be by my side
to accompany me in my lonely nights

i dont wanna be alone
i wanna have a home
and wanna come home
but the smile and the friendliness...all gone

ive just been thrown
from the crown
to the rubbish dump
you gave me light
and by now it has turned into night
its very dark
and i need a hug
to comfort me
wherever i'll be

please save me from this distrust
i wanna forget my past
please save me from not believing my friends
i wanna cure my pains
my tears
my fears

i hate it

without any reason, you just let me go
the warmth of your hand, now i cant feel it anymore
it's so dark, yet so cold
im hurt, crushed deep inside,
will take me centuries til im old
til i can get back to my line

are you sure you still wanna do this..?
are you sure you still wanna carve the 'fear' on me..?

i dunno why
but i hate it...

you know what

the way you treat me
i hate it

boredom..

2007-05-17T19:16:00.000+08:00

boredom.. againnnn...
wish you all the best 4 concert tmr...=)

and uh...
midyear..
dun feel like talking abt it now..

boredom..

2007-05-16T20:11:00.000+08:00

boredom..=(
haha

i havent updated my dearry bloggie for some time...
u shud b happy to see me back jackie!!!! haha
well cuz the internet connection wuz spoilt..>< so.. ya, not my fault! not my fault!! hahahhh

okie...i dunno wad to say..-.-"

ahh!
i ve checked most of my midyear papers...><
and i think i screwed up some subjects.... ohwell....

BUT I STILL WANNA THANK MY STUPID-IRRITATING-ACTCUTE-ACTPRETTY-ATTITUDEPROBLEM-BUT-SUPERNICE-AND-WHATEVERISAIDWASACTUALLYJUSTALIE-FRIEND FOR GIVING ME SUPPORT AND ICE CREAM DURING EXAMS! XP

WHOEVER FEELS LIKE BEING MENTIONED HERE,PLEASE SHOW YOUR GRACIOUSNESS BY SAYING YOUR WELCOME!!!HAHAHA

ok then.. uhm.. i just tripped on the pavement..>< so painful sia! but then, hopefully it can recover within 1 week!!!!!!!!!!
LETS SEE LATER!!! give me 1 week to recover!!!! hahaha=)

tmr, we'll b checking scripts again...-.-"
physics.. (crossfinger!!!><),
emaths... (crossfinger!!!><)
bio................................. (double crossfinger!!!!!!>< triple! quadriple!)

ah wdv...
i so scared...><

oh btw, last night, 1 of my juniors (frm other country) came to me, asking abt sth that id nvr want anybody to say that to me..
she said that i (my personality) changed a lot, and now im a complete stranger to her.. unlike the jessica that she knew...
u know what, i wus quite angry wif her..for sayin that to me... cuz i know that i change, and i want to change.. i want to b a better person...

if i dun talk to her so often anymore..its nt cuz my 'inside' has changed.. its just that, i feel a bit awkward..the way she said a word is so complicated til i got confused and mood swing cuz of that..esp since she kept tellin me things and insisting what she thot wuz right.. probably...>< so im really sorry to her, but i think it's time 4 her to think twice b4 she say sth.. since she might accidentally make ppl get angry cuz of that...

and 2nd thing.. its hard to say this, but.. she alr created pic and image of me in her mind.. so she expected me to b like that.. and cannot accept to any changes..
well..i change.. my reaction towards some problem has now changed.. and she kept tellin me that shes happy as long as im happy for my change..and as long as i dun hate her its okay.. its just so...*aargh.. i dunno..>< i dun feel com4table wif her sayin that.. seems like ive been treating her that badly that i hav no reason to change the way i react towards certain things.. it put me into a not-so-good-position
and her word seemed like trying to make me feel about so big..
like,
appealing to my simpathy.. or sth like that..

she doesnt know anything about me..that's the 1st thing..so pls dont sound like you do..

i just dont like it..=(

heyho!!

2007-05-11T21:11:00.001+08:00

hey!!!~~~ finally you're back!!!!!!!!!><

heyho!!

2007-05-11T21:11:00.000+08:00

hey!!!~~~ finally you're back!!!!!!!!!><

hey..

2007-05-10T18:41:00.000+08:00

tmr!!!! finally! you know what, ive been waiting this whole week til tomorrow!!!

my buddy will b back here! huahahhaa...XP

y u go away so long ah??
y? y> y? y? y? yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, yy?
hahahha im super high..

on the other side..
i dun want tmr to come...>< tmr i'll b gettin back my english paper!!!!><
omg im so scared!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can u imagine. how if i sucked my english>???
im scaredddd
scareeeeeddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

i hope i wouldnt suck it..><

btw, i wus so pissed off.. ha3 one of my besties.. emailed me.. n talked craps in the email.. til like few paragraphs talking abt how she was so bored and she couldnt find anythin to do so finally she crapped to me...
irritating!!!!!!!!!><

ha3
but i miss her anw.. y she lives so far away frm singapore...??

ahh
ohya..
this june holiday:

i wanna go to the mall, shopping everyday!!!!!!!
haha
and ask my dad to teach me drive again!
=D

ahh

2007-05-09T20:34:00.000+08:00

ahh... its gettin nearer to the release of midyear result...
i dont want, and would never want to see them...
it's gettin stressful...

bored..boreddd

2007-05-08T15:45:00.000+08:00

guess what.. todays a holiday!!!=D

it's quite a stuff to b happy abt, but... i think i got nth to do.. now i get real bored....
my sms buddy is gone.. last night, my frens were busy doin their own stuff...
super boreddddd.....>< so finally i ended up callin my fren in indo.. diana...
haha shes super lucky caaan... she asked me to buy her the coat-highlighter.. like 10 colours lidat... frm kinokuniya..guess what, this morn i intended to go indo embassy.. arrived there at 12.30 cuz i got lost, and the guard told me that i need to get there at 9 to 12 am 4 the changing address services..
aarghh!!!!!! i got so pissed of cannn... and so, finally i went to kinokuniya.. to orchard down there and got the thingy for her.. haha must thank me hor...
im such a nice fren!!!XD
oh then, i ended up spending money on some dvd-r, charchoals and pastels for drawing!!!>< omgomgomgomgomg!!!!

btw, last night.. i wuz damn bored.. wuz planning on sleepin late so i wouldnt need to come downstairs to hav breakfast...and ya, i slept at 2am!! went online frm my room 4 a while.. n get pissed off cuz JACKIE NV REPLY MY IM!!!
haha
oh and i worked on some drawin using charcoals...i bought them few days ago.. the low quality one..='(
got no nice charcoal in mph n popular la! only got made-in-china-or-taiwan charcoal.
i wanted to buy the derwent pastels.. or the nicer charcoal..the one that if u want to cut it, u use penknife.. ya.. theyre cool..=D like, the one in titanic!! that leo used!!! hahaha thats probably y i finally went to art.friend... but then, i was confused of whether i shud buy charcoal or graphite..

in the end.. of cuz, i bought charcoal.. since my charcoals in indonesia are gone...><
so sad u know, i got this whole pencilbox of various kinda charcoals and i lost them...>< dunno y..='( btw,

so last night, i ended up drawin mrs rosalie's order to draw her and her hubbie's wedding pic.. haha

and i worked on a drawin of my fren's face..
probably for her super super belated bday present.. (12 march!!! crazy ehh.. 2 months late...><) ...like, copyin frm the photo of my fren's during her film-makin...
woah... too bad..
my drawin not good>< ..mrs capel n her hubbie become like, aargh..><
and my fren becomes so ugly... not like the real person..

oops.. sorry...><

2007-05-04T15:26:00.000+08:00

hahaha...><
guess what.. ive almost finished my midyear!!!!><
happy happy happy!!!!
emaths n malay left!!!>< tho i noe that i gt memorise all those 125 proverbs...
but im still happy

well,k.. uhm..
today's physics..
it wuz okay.. but i did question some questions.. hahaha and so, cuz of the limited time.. i just took my pen, and made some nice paragraphs of what i thought of that question...^^ writer-wanna-be!!!
haha of cuz, it suits me better if we add some words in front so it becomes..
not-a-good-writer-wanna-be....-_-"

im so bored.. dunno wat to do today.. feel like eating out.. hahaha

im sick of hostel's food...><
indonesia!!!
where is the indo food...???? where????

...tahu telor
...nasi padang (super hot one!!!)
...ayam kampung
...gudeg, gado-gado, kerak telor..
...indomie... home cooked indomie.. hahaha
...meatballs!!!!>< indo meatballs so nice caaan......... in singapore u can only find fishballs and prawnballs..!!!!
...satay padang!!!!

omgomgomgomg
drools...><

study study study

2007-05-02T16:23:00.000+08:00

aarghh!!!
tmr's bio!!!!>< ohnoooooooo...............

gotta study hard..!!! n im still on the com... tsk tsk tsk..
hahaha
anw..
since i got nth better to crap abt..

i totally sucked my geog!!!!
><
havent finished yet!!!>< ohno.. i just couldnt manage my time that well...

and so my mood wuz down..
and up again when i started to do my amaths.. haha

im not sure whether id get real good mark or not.. hopefully ya...
and i truly madly deeply hope that my geog mark wouldnt b like rubbish...><

it was damn hard cannnnnn...........
i din finish some of the question.. well, not so many, but im just not sure of whether she'd tick my points correct or not..

but despite that sad fact that i need to cram for my bio..
and i need to get over the friggin' deadly geog paper..

i'd like to thank someone
for the nicenicenice ice cream ytd!!!^0^

aiyo.. tho myb it was what caused me to feel sleepy.. hahaha
kidding la
y u gave me ice cream? y? y?
xp

im sorry

2007-05-01T10:44:00.000+08:00

to my friend out there.

thank you
you've nt only seen the white of me
but also the blackest black of me..
and i just cant imagine of you still receiving me as your friend
it's just like a dream
unimaginable..

ive left you for so long
ive stood you up for other friends
but still, you help me go through my problem
you taught me how to move on
you taught me how to manage my own life
you taught me how to win myself
you taught me so many things
i just cant mention them all.. its always more than what i think
i dont know what else to say but thank you

you know dat
i kept forgetting about you when ive got my friends with me
i didnt mean to do that, as my heart believes
now i come to the sense, you've reached so deep
deep, deep here

when you told me that you're disapponted in me

i was crushed.
feels like all my blood rushed,
i dunno what to do
yet i feel realy bad to you

if i could live for one more day
i really would like to say

thanks for all the courage you've given to me
shines here
inside my heart
im flying, soon i will depart
to visit the world that i never knew
to see the unseen things goin through
and as im flying up in the sky
i will never forget that you had helped me to try
listened when i cried
breathe through my flesh when i die

friend, i really thank you

and just last night
when you talk to me, i was in my fight
to do what i was supposed to do
your words echoing in my head, telling me to clear up the messy stuff inside my dark, hiding place
you opened my eyes, widely
so i now know what im meant to be
thanks cuz you're the one who really cares
about my life, my usual days
im sorry i disappoint you
i always disappoint you
and im afraid if i will do
again

so random

2007-05-01T10:37:00.000+08:00

im looking forward to find a light that shines in my heart..

im looking forward to find a bravery
helping me to go through every problems in my life...
causing a plethora of troubles..
triangle of problems
circle of sadness

well
i just want to move on

random

hello

2007-04-30T18:20:00.001+08:00

chem paper today!!! i feel so relieved!!!=D

no.. uhm... 30% relieved!!! hahaha
my 35% goes to bio
20% goes to phy
5% amaths
5% malay
25% geog
so add up together becomes 120%!!!
><
sheesh
im so high
hahaha

it wus ok.. i guess, its just e matter of whether i'd get b for my chem or not...
hopefully...><
aarghhhh

btw, thx to my dearest friendS who wished me luck 4 my chem
and mrs capel also!
hahaha
^^

scared..

2007-04-28T18:35:00.000+08:00

(continuing the previous post just now)

im scared of what'd happen aft midyear
will i b seeing mrs headmistress again...?? i will. definately
will she b asking me to give up wif my fate..?? she might.

im scared.
im scared.
if id hafta stop..stop running away frm this monster called time, chasing aft me.
im scared.
if id b running out of time, what'd i do..? how wuld i be?? i dunno.
im scared.
of my limitations..and my disabilities.. im scared.

it's not only cuz of the pressure
...
seems like my life is doin this. what we call a really fast pace..
can i keep up the pace..??

listen.
life's so strange
yet, unimaginable...
whatever you do now, whatever you had done earlier, or whatever you're gonna do tomorrow, and the day after...

have you ever imagined it earlier..? of who we'd meet
of who and what we'd be

well, reminiscing the earlier days of life
seemed like there wasnt much of a pressure back then
and now it changed..
ya, life changes so fast
this is called the mystery
and sometimes it brings a misery
but can i look happy in front of them?
can i..? ..shudnt be much of a problem.. but
can i feel happy..?
i just dunno..
i just cant think properly.do i hv to fight..
or shud i just wait, sit bact and relax..

well, im scared..

...
...

nah..atop feeling so negative..

>< when i thought abt it twice.
ive actually had experience such wonders in my life. when im down then someone pulled me out of what we called the darkness
and when im sad, some just give me what we called a smile
it enlightens my days.. surely
myb i shud change the title..??
haha..
craps.
that reminds me of the paper i just did..back in few days..

courage..??
=)
i smiled.. that's a good thing

i think i shud get up now.. and do what im supposed to do
new day..?

smile.. and it makes me tired...

2007-04-28T18:19:00.000+08:00

well, nt much 4 today..
been mugging...cramming up 4 my chemistry
and i realised that my brain is so bright today!!!~~~ hope it will last til monday!!!^^
no.. end of mye..
nah.. o levels..>< eh no!! shud b foreva>.<

ahhh
im so random!!!!!
myb its partly cuz of my super stressful exams.. mid year exams.. mye.. whatever..-.-"
i hv no time to go online for hours, unlike me...
ahh.. need to cram for school.. sheesh.. i havnt finished my revision yet..

and my online buddy... shes busy for her assignments...>< nt much time to go online..hope to see you soon!!! when's next next next next holiday...??

..
you know what, for this mye you can see my room full of "posters".. haha nt really posters,its more like, uhmm.. motivational words.. tho finally i spend my time more in reading room than in my own room..go back to my rm to sleep lahs.><
im uhm.. scared..

hey..

2007-04-26T16:56:00.000+08:00

hey, guess what.. i dun feel like posting that life's so strange anymore.. hahaha
so.. ya, really sorrie hor...^^
well
these few days, ive been suffering frm the cutting electricity.. hahaha
not really suffering actually, cuz it wuz really fun!!!!!~~
guess what, we studied together in the dining hall and reading rm!!! so funnn..=D
and sandy and i kept kicking each other since we studied facing one another on a sofa.. haha so nice eh, got sofa in a reading rm eh..??xp
and so..
TODAY I CAN GO ONLINE EVERYDAY!!! BLOG EVERYDAY!!! YAYYY!!!^0^

eh wait..
no..><
sheesh.. still got exams nx week.. concentrated some more...
jackieee!!!!!!!! what shud i doooo????????????????????><

...
okie.. then uhm... i feel like eating indonesian food.. haha
thats so random...=D

you know what, i sucked the ss seq no.2...>< i wrote that i disagree of a statement "there shoudnt hv been foreign intervention..blah blah blah sri lanka"
i totally 4got abt the peacekeeping force that caused lotsa death..!!!! but then, sandy said that i shud disagree... cuz blah blah blah i 4got the reason alr
hahaha
so i dunno.. so afraid eh...>< oh butbutbut... i wuz very nervous b4 the exam!!!><
the paper coming!!! arghhhh!!! sth lidat...well i din say it out loud, of cuz... its just buckled down my mind.. haha
and i felt very relieved once i saw i just gotten a msg.. it says "good luck!"
woah.. thx ah... y sent me sms ah? y support me ah? y u so nice uh? y u stay on the 7th floor ah? y? y? y? i want to know Y!!!
^0^ haha.. u know what, cuz of YOU, i cant post a shout out "one letter y.." anymore on friendster...>< feel very awkward.. hahaha
...

back to the topic: mye!!!><
oh then, today, im mugging for my emaths!! and amath!!! so later on i dun need to study the two subjects anymore..^^ must finish!!!! aarghh..
but then the revision paper so thick eh...consisted of many many many papers...how can i manage to finish one in half an hour????>< oh no..

well, i might b a lil busy in few days...>< gt finish some art club stuff... ohno...
then i gt study, revise..
=)
but it's okayyyy... still hv time to relax. i always do, obviously.. haha
ohya, recently i havent been productive in writing songs...><

omg, i hope aft mid year i can find some inspiration...!!!!!><

inspiration!
inspiration!
inspiration!!!!!

..
-______-""
so random.. haha

cant believe it

2007-04-22T21:34:00.000+08:00

cant believe it.. life's so strange...
will post abt this later) haha

...

2007-04-21T18:25:00.000+08:00

omg..
midyear is coming....
b4 for bio and chem!!!

nobody knows

2007-04-21T17:42:00.000+08:00

check out this song:
Nobody knows by Pink..
so sad the lyric.. deep sia!

Nobody knows
Nobody knows but me
That I sometimes cry
If I could pretend that I'm asleep
When my tears start to fall
I peek out from behind these walls
I think nobody knows
Nobody knows

Nobody likes
Nobody likes to lose their inner voice
The one I used to hear before my life
Made a choice
But I think nobody knows
Nobody knows

Baby
Oh the secret's safe with me
There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be
And baby don't it feel like I'm all alone
Who's gonna be there after the last angel has flown
And I've lost my way back home
I think nobody knows no
I said nobody knows
Nobody cares

It's win or lose not how you play the game
And the road to darkness has a way
Of always knowing my name
But I think nobody knows
Nobody knows

Baby
Oh the secret's safe with me
There's nowhere else in the world that I could ever be
And baby don't it feel like I'm all alone
Who's gonna be there after the last angel has flown
And I've lost my way back home
Nobody knows

Tomorrow I'll be there my friend
I'll wake up and start all over again
When everybody else is gone

Nobody knows
Nobody knows the rhythem of my heart
The way I do when I'm lying in the dark
And the world is asleep
I think nobody knows
Nobody knows
Nobody knows but me
Me

a holiday and ytd.. so funnnnnn..... happy happy

2007-04-06T12:32:00.000+08:00

ehlo.. havent blogged for a while...><
ive been feelin really tired recently. wif no exact reason.. hahaha

u know what.. im thinking of my university life.. random..><
i think i'd choose some study abt engineering or arts n design.. hahaha
and hopefully i can get good marks in my mye!!!!

><
it's coming soon.. i scared leh
...
haha

ohya, u know wad, ytd was know's bday...
we made some surprises for her wif candles and pizza pan..
like, decorate the pizza pan wif 17 different types of candles...=) wif some gold ribbons.. woahh so nice n romantic eh.. hahaha and we made black out in her room, then waited til know came.. and she was shocked!!!!! myb partly cuz we hadnt made any surprises for her on the previous day at midnight.. hahaha and she thot i was goin to the night safari... so, ya.... so fun! so fun!!!!!^^ oh and we bought this ben&jerry ice cream!!! the new york whatever fudge... i forgot... but it was damn nice caaaannn... i was like, "if only my bday was today.."
and hui ching kept saying, "DONT eat the ice cream!!!" hahaha.... and we, i mean, kathy, pynx, hui ching and I did the decoration at 8sth.. just started lidat.. and we managed to finished in 2 hours!!!!=D tho the candles couldnt really stick to the pan, and it took us another 5 minutes to fix one candle...><
really, really difficult, but as pynx said, with the "four-pronged approach" and the "two-pronged approach", we did it!!! hahahahahaha it was quite lame actually.. but ya.. we really did call it "four and two-pronged approach.." too much studying ss myb..??

btw,i gave her some stars, folded myself..^^ and put em into a bottle.. haha and a bookmark.. simply nice right???xD

and so happy, unexpected-or-expectedly(..??), we ate the ben &jerry together...!!!!
it was damn nice caaaannnnnnnnnn>< thou it looked more like a soup than ice cream, wif the almond and choco chips inside.. haha and a bit gross yes, cuz we ate it wif many spoons, sometimes exchanged them, and we sort-of-stir the things inside to find the choco chips wif different spoons.. so.. dunno,

hopefully there wasnt any saliva in the ben&jerry we ate..hahaha kidding la...^^ but it was damn fun though...=D
too bad fiona was stayin out...>< and my juniors, kat n i, the 4 of us, we helped fiona to sneaked out of the hostel....haha we were like, "uhh.. tkgs student doin this..." since i was still wearing my tk shirt at 11pm.. havnt bathed.. hahaha too busy doin the thing for know.... haha

happy happy! but dunno y aft the party i felt very tired, and my mood went low..
til today... still feelin that.. haha

and i'm happy that easter is coming!!! later tonight im going to city harvest to see their super cool drama performance!!!!^^ i had been goin to city harvest church before i decided to start goin to an indonesian church at carlton hotel last week..
and this ch church is really big!!! like, more than 7000ppl evry service.. i think it shud be 9000 or 10000 lidat...>< wahlao...
compared to this indo church which has only 100 members city harvest seems so.... wow..
hahaha

but then, in this indo church, i'll have more indo fren, and they're just nice... i can meet lotsa new ppl other than the indo scholars.. hahaha and ya... it's just nice, especially the part that i can do sth to the church, as in, like playing the musical instruments, or ushering ppl.. and i reckon it's important to us to do that..
like, to serve God.. =D ya...
so im happy to be in this community!!!^^ yayyy..

but i do miss city harvest... so tonight im goin there...!!!!!=D remind me to bring some sweets for breakfasting.. hahaha ;p

well, i think this is long enuf for today...=)

happy happy! yay! haha

good, good friday

2007-04-06T12:02:00.000+08:00

today is a good friday...
tomorrow is an even better saturday,
cuz the next day Jesus rises up from the death, the next day, the sunday..

thx Lord God for the life that you've given to me
and for my friends and family
and that you've set me free
frm all my sin, you forgive me..

thank you Jesus, for filling up my life
with all the happiness and the experience without you i can never have
that you've saved my life, my days so i can meet you in the end
and you always listen to me, that you're my Best Friend

thank you Holy Spirit, for helping me with all my days
when im desperate You always show me the way..
you let me be all new
I dont know what to say but thank you...

If now i have a lot of problems
that this pain i cant relieve
you'll take care of me, cleanse my soul so that
i can forgive ppl who did wrong around me
i can forgive myself, for doing wrong to others too
i can pray for my enemy
i can pray for people around me and not be selfish
Lord please change me

if im now not a good friend
aint a good person either
aint a good student
aint a good daughter, yet a good sister
Lord please change me

if now im praying for this world
for my country indonesia
for my friends
for my family and relatives
for evrything meant a lot to me in my life
for myself, my study and my future
Lord please hear me

And i know you'll always hear my prayer
and i know you'll always help me to be a better person
and i need your help to light up the fire in my heart, to be closer to you
to be spirited in whatever i do
so Lord, Jesus, help me..

i shouted, looking for someone that can help me
i shouted, i couldnt find anybody..
Lord I'm sorry, if i ever forgot about you being beside me evryday, evry minute, evry second...
i want to always remember about You, my friend when i'm happy
when i'm sad
You're my problem solver, and always make me contented when i do a good deed..

right now i need your miracle
a miracle to change my whole life, so i will not be this lazy little girl anymore
so that i will improve my life
a miracle so i can be smarter, as You're the one who has created me and place me here for a reason
your miracle is true, i believe in You.

and for the rest of my life
i'll always follow you, my Friend, my Lord, my Saviour...
so help me, purify me, dont let me be the same..
this i pray to You

nice song, again

2007-04-06T12:00:00.000+08:00

nice nice and nice and lovely songs...=D
hahaha i like the rhymes... so cool !!!!

Way Back into Love Lyrics

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need them again someday
I've been setting a side time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's gotta be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation

All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end

life is good!!!

2007-03-29T19:29:00.000+08:00

here's a song by nathan hartono..>< so nice, the lyrics!!!!>< oh nooooooo
im crazy of it...><
oh btw, he's an INDONESIAN!! haha n this is actually an INDONESIAN SONG! hahaha.. just sum1 translated it into english...=)
damn nice....n soothing, if u hear the song... hahahhhh

if only u noe how i mean these lyrics to be sung 4 you.. too bad i cant sing, and i think i wouldnt have a chance to...

Life is Good!

I was there
When the sun wasn't shining
When the pain was blinding you
With those tears and fears

Never give in
To sadness that surrounds you
Find a way to reach deep inside
And just let your love shine through

Cuz' tomorrow, is just a little step away
I'll be there, to help you start believe in love again
Tell me that you're waiting
Waiting for that happiness

Is there an easier way into your heart
Must be some ways where we can make a start
I am for real
And i'm just a step away

And when you leave the painful past behind
You'll see the world with a different state of mind
I will be there
I'm waiting to see your smile

Cuz' tomorrow, is just a little step away
I'll be there, to help you start believe in love again
Tell me that you're waiting
Waiting for that happiness

Please see the light
Our hearts take flight

To tomorrow, is just a little step away
We'll be there, as long as you believe in love again

Why must we still be waiting
Oh please don't keep me waiting
Cuz' I know that we're waiting
Waiting for that happiness

Don't walk away
Just take a look
Soon you will find
Life's Really Good!

song..song...

2007-03-28T19:22:00.000+08:00

just wrote a new song....
dedicated to jackie, lynette, charmaine n sherlyn..
diana, rutte, evi...
thank you guys, 4 rockin my days no matter where i am!!! yayy!!!
ho3 myb sometime i'll sing..xp
love you guys!!!!!!^^

happy friendship day!!! ha3 4 myself..xp actually this is the 1st song i've ever written abt friends..=) been making lotsa songs abt my life, some "lovelove" stuff..xp but none of them are abt friends..=) so... njoy.. hahaha

and special dedication to
a friend whom i always share with.. (no name mentioned)
been taking up ur time cuz of my lame jokes n my lame story..
sorry, but thank you..=)
love you loads!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU

You lit up the candle in my mind
There's no one can satisfy
Bring me back into the line
Made me would want to cry

You have touched my heart so deeply
Now I can fly completely
And right now I can stand
It's all because of you, my friend

[chorus]
You've changed my life
Lifted me up to the blue sky
You've made me brave to try
I can testify

It's all because of you
I'm now out of the blue
My life is brand new
And I can only say
Thank you

When I was down,
You led me through the light
Fulfilled what my soul needed

Now I have flown,
Away from the night
The darkness I leave it
The sun I can feel it
[chorus twice]

thinking..and thinking

2007-03-25T13:15:00.000+08:00

...
thinking of you
waiting for the rain in the summer

thinking of you
healing all my fears and help me dry my tear

thinking of you
helping me out and make me feel better

thinking of you
i'm missing you

it's kinda long story
like the old diary i was writing
well, let's remember
go back to the journey
when i used to go places i was hiding
and my eyes pointed to one door i wanted to enter
it's the door of my memory
and as soon as i was entering
i was brought back to a place i wouldnot want to go..never and ever

and so i thought of you

and so im missing you

heyya

2007-03-22T17:55:00.000+08:00

heyy.. finally i blogged aft a while..^^
well well.. today was so fun!!!!=D

u noe wad, aft the bio lesson in com lab3, we went back to the class.. and suddenly i noticed, these two ppl who were sounding so stupid.. saying wadevawadevablablabla..then the other one replied, "me too!!!" n they kept replying to each other, "me three!" "...four!" "...five!" again...n again... til they reached "me infinity!"
..thot they wuld stop.. but then....
"me double infinity!"
...
man, how long wuld it last...??>< dunno leh...oh ya!! of cuz, they are charmaine and lynette!!! hahaha....

oh thenthenthen...
jackie n i were like, "uhh.. wdv..-.-" swt swt swt" wif that typical 'duh' face..
yeahh..like, giving a weird-looking towards them...

too bad..friends can easily affect their friends..><

in only few seconds, when jackie said sth i 4got, i ans "me too!"
n EXPECTEDLY, she ans "me three!" n so i said "me four!"
AARGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"me six!"
"me seven!"
AAARGHHHH again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"me infinity!"
AAARGHHHH AGAIN AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
we sayin that while laughing... n ironically, we couldnt stop laughing..><
my stomach very painful sia...>< n then lynette said jessica lobster or sth lidat.. or apple? tomato?? ah dunno la...for sure, she was sayin that my face turned red!!! hahaha

ohya, n jackie culdnt stop laughing either.. it was so funny can!!!!><
hahahaha i smilin while typing this eh...

oh thenthenthen...
mrs hoy called me, talked abt my term1 result..><
man.... i din do it on purpose!!!!
i dun wanna go back to indo!!!
well, i want.. but not now...>< plsplspls....
now im really scared.....

holiday??

2007-03-13T13:39:00.000+08:00

this is my 1st post for march holiday!!!

well, i dun think i'd post evryday..><
no mood.. no mood..
lotsa things to do
oh btw, im in indonesia alr..

i felt relieved u noe, like, im free frm that endless school
thou im nt yet free frm the endless hol hw..><
i dun like! i dun like!

oh btw, jackie starts to blog againn
hahaha
=)

and so sad, im nt in contact wif my friends i've met in singapore...
like, all the asean ppl.. and prc ppl.. hahaha
the last person i contacted was... umm.. jackie! since she was telling me abt her blog just now... yea yea... cute skin though...

second last was my guangzhou friend, wen yusi.. ha3 she called me on sunday, too bad i culdnt answer the call, since i was on e plane when she called...
but finally i sms her frm soekarno-hatta international airport in jakarta!!!!

3rd last was sherlyn, since she was one of the only 2 ppl picked up the phone on sunday beside sheena... so bad la u jackie...tsk tsk tsk... haha oh n we talked til i got tired..=)

eh
y am i talking abt this??
so crap la..... wahlao..><

oh oh oh, btw, when i just arrived here, i somehow 4got how to speak bahasa lol..
my mum asked me abt my term 1 result.. dunno y, just couldnt find a word to ans my mum... then i kept answering her in english.. noooooooo....><
my cuz the last person i talked to that time was sherlyn,...
woahh sherlyn..... bad influence huh...?? hahahaha

well well, njoy ur holidays...!!!

=)

2007-03-11T12:01:00.000+08:00

eh.. last post frm singapore this term!!!!!!
the next post will b typed frm indonesia!!!!!
hahahahahhaa
^^

well, singapore, cya next week

bye all!!!
see ya jackie!^^

well today.

2007-03-09T20:41:00.000+08:00

just gotten back my term1 result..>< i screwed up evrything
it was damn bad man...>< im depressed and im super depressed....

ohya.. btw, this sunday i go back to indo!!!=) well happy happy happy...
n stressed stressed stressed... knowing that i'll b spending 70% of my holidays by doin my hw and all my holiday assgnment...-.-

oh, i shall talk abt library cip today..
i went to library wif cham2, berny n jackie...>< it was quite fun though...
BUTBUTBUT
i went there wif a really bad mood.. dunno y..-.- n really sorry ya 2 evryone i guess i made ur day worsened...ahhhh

eh btw
so sad that cham2 went back 1st.. i think she got sth goin on at home.. or sth..
then i continued doin cip til 6.30...
well then, we ate dinner at McD.. i ate filet-o-fish n jackie copied me!!!ha3
random lol...><

aft that, as i was walking to e bus interchange, i suddenly came up wif the idea of goin back to tampines mall>< dunno y
myb cuz i was feeling lonely, so i just wanted some1 to talk to.. ya, i guess...
(cuz now im in tiara's room!!! hahahaa smuggled smuggled...^^)
oh ya, so i called jackie for a few times, hoping she was still there..
well she was still in tampines mall, but just my luck, couldnt find her.
so.....
wif very heavy steps i walked back to the interchange n went back to hostel..
suddenly, i passed victoria hall (vh)... then i went into my x-hostel...yah... that's how im here now..><

too bad that i've been feeling so lonely recently...

and sorry... i really din mean it... the words just blurted out of my tounge...><
you're nt irritating,
you're so nice in fact.. and i guess i feel like i'm now a much better person than before, cuz of you and ur friends...
yeahh thx, thanks a lot...
n i dunno how to say this to you, so i just write it in my blog...
really sorry ya
..
see you aft holiday=)
dun miss me! hahaha

one last try

2007-03-05T18:37:00.000+08:00

scared. again.

when i tried to win, i lost.
when i struggled, i lost.
when i strived, i lost.
when i fought against my own paradigm, i lost.

why>
and there's just one word
why?

when i ran, i fell down
when i jumped, i fell. again
on the ground..

ouch! i shouted
i cried.....

well i dunno what to do
it's that the phantom keeps chasing me from behind
i'm scared
i'm scared of getting caught
i'm scared of my own limit
when should i stop?
or should i even stop?

.....
well i guess i should stand up
again
with my remaining strength
my remaining courage and bravery
this, is my
one last try.

havent blogged...

2007-03-02T15:35:00.000+08:00

heyya
havent blogged for quite a long time.. well, suddenly i dun have any more desire to blog these few days..
anw, sch doin not good.. i scared of my term 1 result.. i guess i'll get more than 20 for my l1r5, which 'll put me into a list of names will b called by moe to have a cup of tea, discussing abt the term2 and wad i gonna do if it doesnt change...><
some sort-of-warning, telling you that you may b terminated...-.-

well i guess i've lied a lot to my frens.. looking happy when im nt happy
smiling when i dun wanna smile
it's a bit burdening..yet depressing><

oh btw, i miss home even more.. i cant wait til one week.. hahaha

and this noon, the sch just told us some 'stuff' abt o level, its kinda depressing though...><

i hope i wont fail any subjects, and i get to a JC that i wanna go to.
well, i guess i'll hafta tell someone abt this...-.-

im scared.

wad a day

2007-02-25T13:34:00.000+08:00

a boring day
nth to do
well, except amaths hw..><
hahaha
oh and
been watching material girls (for the 2nd time!!!)
wif know...-.-
ya la
that's all
hahaha

books books books

2007-02-24T20:48:00.000+08:00

heyya! these 2 days are really tiring days 4 me...><
but fun, though..=)
well ytd, i went to tampines library aft sch.. wif jackie! hahahahhh n we got confused wif each other, since jackie told cham2 we were goin to marine parade library, and i told her we goin to tampines library.. cham2 was like, "eh??? i thought you're goin to marine parade library??"
then i was like, "huh what???"
=p
at first we were like, "eh,will we get lost??" since id nv been there b4, and jackie wasn so sure.. but luckily, jackie rmb e location of the library..and so we did 3-hrs of shelving etc etc etc..oh, the duty i like most was to arrange the "unwanted" books into a box, to be sent to other library i guess....=) it was kinda fun!!!! hahaha
i like tampines library.. so nice!!! but i just dont like the fact that im nt so free there.. so i nv slack there...-.-" unlike marine parade.. hahahh but its ok, since i did it wif other fren, it still fun!!!!=D

then aft that, i got emergency call frm my dearest know, asking me to teach our juniors paperboy dance, since kat n pynx "the dancers" were practising the thingy for captain's ball tournament.. and so, i sacrificed my online time.. hahaha
but it was fun!!!! yayy
thx 4 helping know... love ya loads!!! hahaha
well the practise ended at 11plus.... and including the time we watched kat n pynx creating the new movements for the dance, i think we ended ard 12..crazy!!!!

and i slept at ard 1 cuz i went to my juniors' room and watched movie, tho finally i slept in e middle of the movie.. material girls starring hilary duff n haylie duff.. haha had watched it last week..=)

this morn, woke up at ard 7.30, n go practise badminton.... 2hrs non stop... fi gave me a training.. so tiring cannn....
but it was fun..since actually id started to play badminton long b4 i played basketball...like, p1 i used to play evryday in morn wif my dad...=)
i miss him so much!!!!!!><

oh ya, aft that, i nv eat lunch n rushed to tampines library... meeting jackie. n did cip for 4 hours!!!! i was like, omigosh.... my stomach couldnt stop grumbling.. >< at 1st i was afraid. since actually i can easily get gastric if i dun eat on time... my mum also like that... but ya. finally i survived!!!!!=) til i came back to e hostel ard 8pm and ate my instant noodle..so sad.. unhealthy food ya...=(
hahahhaa
was too hungry cannnn...>< oh, although i had drunk McDonald's milkshake in tampines.. hahahhahaha
i guess that makes my dinner super heavy..><
oh ya
then i took bath and...

online!!!
as im doin right now!!!
so.. ya.. ok
njoy the rest of the day!!! hahaha

vday!!!!

2007-02-17T15:50:00.000+08:00

heyya!!! here are the photos taken on vday that i promised!!! hahaha
so nicee!!!!
i got more chocolate n sweets than last year! and the pic below, it's excluded frm another chocolates i received the next day!!! yayy!!!! hohoho

and here's from lynette.. so cute!!! cupid or sth.. i guess..

and this one frm cham2!!!!

the choc frm grace "babe"! hahaha.. it was kinda funny though.. since we bought each other the same brand choc.. and at the same time some more.. we were like, "eh babe, how if you buy me toblerone and you buy me toblerone too babe?" haha.. cuz i din no wad she wanted and she din know wad i wanted either! but finally we nv buy toblerone.. hahaha

eh!! sherlyn made the card you know.. so nice.... i din no that sherlyn so sweet.. hahaha

now here's the gift frm my dearest jackie!!! hahaha the star so nice sia....^^

nah.. that's all for vday!!!!><
so sad that actually i still have lots of other pics.. but cannot host them, dunno y...-.-
oh ya.. ytd i got a jackie-and-charmaine-made-sort-of-wedding-ring.. hahaha

does it look like a ring??
it's actually a drawing on my finger..-.- by pen some more.!!! jackie and charmaine so bad!!!!!!><
i cried
i cried..

><

cny

2007-02-16T17:07:00.000+08:00

ahh
finally
we lost.. our class lost in the deco also
><
sooooo saddddddddddddddddddddddddd
hahahaha
but nvm, its just sum stupid thingy..
sad cuz, we spent 26 bucks on the band practise and 40 bucks on the class deco
not to mention the paint and the brushes being donated by me..-.-

so sadddd...................................

btw
during that song, i screwed the last part.. yeahh..
sheena din notice, but jackie surely noticed... she always acts like she doesnt know music.. but actually shes really good at it.hahhaa

aft the thingy, i almost 4got to go 4 a meeting wif ms elaine... almost accompanied jackie to paya lebar, but then i suddenly rmb..!!!!
so sadd....
i feel supa dupa guilty...
like, jackie has been helping me A LOT this whole yr, starting frm last yr when i din understand wdv the teacher was saying, she always explained to me..
then so many things, uncountable... oh also the vday brownie!
but yet, i cant do anything when she needs help...
jackie, will you tell me when u got prob or sth..??
i felt very bad today...><

tmr.. tmr..

2007-02-15T19:53:00.000+08:00

heyya!!
since it's now prep time already...
must be quick!!!xp
hahhaa
well, today..not much happened.. i just noe i was damn low..til i treated my frens like, so badly..next time i guess i must overcome that mood swing in me..-.-
sorrie frens...><

n tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT'S THE CHINESE NEW YEAR SINGING COMPETITION!!!
im playing DRUMS!!
yayyy!!!!
wish me luck!!!
cuz im too nervous..
im scared..
give me lotsa hugs...........><

ohno
ohno
OHNO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

go syxaphunk!
hahaha
and here's the song we're singing tmr..

autumn has passed, another year spent
longing and waiting for the ones that i love
back at home
i came back from my long journey
greeted and welcomed by the ones that i love
spring has come, spring has come
and i've come home now
spring has come, spring has come
and we're waiting for you...

[chorus]
xin nian dao le, it's chinese new year!
bring out the happy smiles and festive cheers
xin nian dao le, it's chinese new year!
prosperity, longevity, luck and hope
for the future!

autumn has passed, and now i am home
here to celebrate with the ones that i love
we'll have fun
we'll laugh and talk together
while eating and drinking at reunion dinner
spring has come, spring has come
and i've come home now
spring has come, spring has come
and we're waiting for you...
[repeat chorus]
i am home
i'm back from my long journey
we are home
for the new year
friends and family rejoicing
[repeat chorus twice, overtune]

happy, happy valentine's day!!!

2007-02-14T17:46:00.000+08:00

1stly, gonna say happy vday for all ppl in the world!!!^^

and todays the 2nd greatest day in my life!!!! aft my bday of course.. hahaha
well, im tellin you wad i brought to skool 1st..
i ordered these roses 2 wks ago, and when i got the roses ytd, i was like, "what the.." the roses damn ugly man.. i so sad... y evrytime i give roses to jackie always like that, now its worst.. nt only jackie, charmaine, lynette sherlyn also!!!!
hui ching got the worst..omgomg!!!!

well, b4 that..
im gonna remind you that this entry is super duper longgggg

i had bought some choc and gave it to some ppl

sheena-i bought her a red rose..well i guess red rose is more like her, thou its scary since the colour was blood red.. but ya, i gave her mnm also..got reason, cuz she was the mnms during the tkgs xcountry last year! hahaha... she was so cute in that polkadottie shirt..which she stole frm drama club..xp she said she gonna give me the present tmr..xp

then i gave to some other ppl the choc that i bought.. ohya, the roses went to sheena, my babe grace xp, cham2, nadia, lynette jackie n sherlyn...oh and this morn i finished all the roses stuff wif sherlyn doin the lollies...in canteen..xp
oh btw, ytd i went pway wif sherlyn.. then i asked her wad she wants.. she said, "aiya, only vday wad, give me a kiss then ok already"

fine la, this morning i kissed sherlyn.. *oops. hahaha
was like, "eh, sherlyn! come, i give you a kiss!" ><
sherlyn gave me this lollypop bouquet (4 lollies.. nice sia!! n u noe wad, 4 means i really love you.. hohoho) ..and this pink colour card.. sooooooooooo nice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (it's hard to admit it. but ya..)
omigosh!!!! i was touched.. hahaha the 1st time i felt touched today..^^

ok la, otr thing, i printed some photos for them... then i made some drawings for lyn n cham.. lyn got that anime drawing, but i realised it wasnt very nice, so i owe her 1 more.. haha cham got the drawing of five of us..=) i was like, "ohmy, i cant believe i drawed that.." i wasnt too sure whether i can draw our backs or not.. umm... later i post the pic, but must ask sher2 to send me e pic 1st.hahah
and long b4 that, lyn had given us some cute lil stuff.. well, sherlyn got earrings..
i got the cute keychain..eh, is it keychain or isit 4 e phone thingy??
oh, i think its the 2nd one.. haha=) and cham2, gave me that chocolate.. kissables i guess..=) mann... i LOVE CHOCOLATE!!! I LIKE! I LIKE! ILIKE!!! hahaha and i guess that makes vday 1 of the best day evry year!! hahahaha

oh, i gave chocs 4 sherlyn n charmaine n jackie, ohh.. so sad.. jackie din received any choc frm me..xp but ya, i draw sth 4 her.. like, the hand when you promise sth to somebody.. ya..coloured it, as what she asked me to do..=) so ya..i finished it..=) just last night...in study room.. (i told my juniors that i gtg study rm cuz i needed concentration. yeah..to do the drawing for jackie, cham2 n lyn hahaha)

oh ya! jackie!!!
well, in morn i told her that i couldnt find any nice ring for her.. so i bought a bracelet.. hahaha it was totally lie..partly cuz i wanted to see her reaction, and the other reason was just the factor that i got nth better to do! haha oh n partly cuz at 1st i thot cham2 was lying also that she had lost the ring for jackie..so ya.. hahaha (its so embarassing.. haha)
btw, sorry jackie, cuz i got only one ring 4 u instead of 5..but id promised you it's gonna be nice right???...xp if you see this blog..

you know what, i prepared the ring back 2 wks ago..i was like, oh no.. wad shud i buy...you know, im the type that i cant get so many stuff for many ppl, im only giving present to sum1 close to me and i'll give them the nicest i can get..ha3 that made me broke this vday!!!>< oh no... must save money frm now.. goshh......-.-"
ok, then, this noon...

i gave lyn, cham n sher2 the present, and jackie also..
then i said, "ok! finished!!!" w/o giving jackie her ring..xp part of naughty mind..ha2 but no reaction.. fine, then i told her that i lied abt the bracelet, n showed her the ring box.. she was like, so shocked abt it..(i guess)
myb she din expect me to give her anythin..xp
then she opened the box, yeahh the ribbon that i did in more that 15min ytd.. so hard cannn
and i guess she was a bit shocked abt the ring, ha3 but i like seeing her reaction.. it made me touched also...=)
and so she said"eh, i do i do!!".. (was like, "duh.."hahaha) and lyn said, "eh, how come so fast??"
then lyn, cham n sher2 made some kinda wed ceremony..stupid!!! haha

oh, oh, oh.. b4 that.. i had booked that ring finger of jackie's few wks ago!!! so bad jelly came and just put another ring on jackie's booked-ring finger!!!!-.-"
JELLY!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahhahaha
and um..sher2 played that wed song in her phone. i was like, wad song isit?? so weird.. but finally, aft some while i realised it's the wed song..haha

then, sherlyn as the fake priest, said some weird thing, like "jacqueline, will you always be by jessica's side, wdv wdv wdv" but she mentioned some weird stuff.. til i cant stop laughing..ha3 and jackie said, "yes"..and sher did the same thing for me, but it was even weirder, like "always be by jackie's side, (dunno wad i guess she said even though sth sth but not sure), TALL AND SHORT..." WHAT THE..??? i was like, jackie can be shorter meh?? hahaha
well, aft "yes"-ing the promise, then jackie was like "omygod" i guess...-.-
then ya, we got married! ...-.-" no la... obviously only kidding.
hahahaha
i put the ring on her finger, but it's not me if i dont do any naughty stuff, so i kept slipping so she couldnt get the ring on her finger.. hahaha til i was contented enough to see jackie's "duh" face.. so i put the ring on her finger. hahaha

ok that was quite cute
hahaha so happy.. she let the ring on n nv put off, except during the phy lab.. she said ms suzan tee was staring at the ring (or the practical, she nt sure).. but the funny part is that, she said ms suzan tee was jealous.. hahahhahahaha=D

oh and, jackie gave us her handmade brownies...=D freshly baked last sunday
hahaha
did u keep it inside the fridge??xp
and a small bottle wif a star inside.. a "love-letter for 5 ppl..haha" and a pair of precious moment chopsticks!!!sooo happy..ha3 but i guess i dun wanna use the chopstick.. too PRECIOUS.. ha3..

aft skool.. cham2 went to meet her mum.. so she left me wif this irritating jackie. hahaha so ya.. i was eating jackie's bread since i nv have lunch..and i finally realised abt jackie's brownies!!! ya.. then i ate it..=D and it was, uh..kinda sweet though.. but it's ok.. knowing that it was the 1st time she bake brownies and that she's been so sweet to us five, i guess each bite tastes better and better evrytime i bit it..x]
oh and she bought me lemon tea also..=)
thx yooo
hahaha
thou finally today i nv got kiss frm anybody
hahahha
oh
i got
only one..
hahahaha
ohwell..i 4got to tell you, aft skool i went to ntuc express near my hostel and bought some more choc 4 choc party tonite..wif kat n fiona.. and ya.. i bought some small sized ferrero rocher for know.. and accidentally met her just now in com room.. and shes now 3m away frm me..
and ya, i gave her the choc la... she was like, "y never give me any chocolate??" hahaha
know, my dear, i had bought chocolate 4 u.. u nv give me one..-.-

but still.. so saddddd...haha kidding.. kidding..

ya that's all 4 today.lol

happy!

GREATEST VDAY IN MY LIFE!
AND 2ND GREATEST DAY IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!=D

ohmy.. i 4got, and cuz of you guys...
especially the fivesome (as it's written in jacq's loveletter)
my life in sec4 is like, unforgettable...
really, really big hug and kisses for you!!!
mwahhhhxxxxx!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! will never 4get you all

lastly, the post containing photos of my choc supply still waiting!! hahaha

disabled

2007-02-13T19:48:00.001+08:00

...
...
waiting for the clock..
to change the day

people screaming
people scared
..
me too

where are you?
where are you?

"i'm here"

but never be heard...

im opening my arms...
trying to reach your hand...
pulling you out of that hole...

blackest, blackest hole
darkest, darkest hole

oh please, dont ever be like me.
well, she never hears

all i can see is blood.
in my dream
my night dream
my nightmare

helpless
i dont know what to do
i'm supposed to do something

my heart screaming...
but my body cant move.. barriers, walls around me

i cant do anything...
i'm disabled.

oh ya! today!

2007-02-12T19:36:00.000+08:00

heyya!!!~~~
guess what.. i study lol..xp

tmr im havin amaths test.and ive been studyin since noon..=)im happy for myself.. yeahh...^^ well, i guess im now a bit more motivated to study.. at least, much better than last year!!!! and that's a good thing.. since i realised that i've gt catch up wif my frens... my results so lousy..-.-"
ya n i was quite depressed seeing my senior's result.. so ya..
gt study hard...><

oh, and, this noon tiara asked me to meet her at pway..
then i was like, ah, ok.. i dun want to study anyway.. ha3 but then, i felt very bad of not studying.. so i asked jackie..
well, she asked me to stay in hostel n study ... i was like.."duh.. oh no..."

ya i know, im kinda boastful and arrogant..-.-

but, you know what..
jackie..
finally i stay in hostel and study..=)
i guess this is the 1st time in my life in spore i really study for amaths.. oh but, i havent done any practise yet..>< myb later tonight...
but ya.. quite # of things to do..
1)art club stuff
2)the thingy for cham2 n lyn
ok la, nvm ...

i guess i'd better go off now.. hafta STUDY.. hahaha=)

oh thx 4 e irritating person who asked me to study amaths today!!!=D
lalala...

ohohoh, btw, abt the vday thingy..
i told jackie that im makin that drawin for lynette n cham2..
n havent bought anythin yet for sherlyn... and ya... she asked me what im getting for her..
i was sayin like, im nt getting anythin for her.. myb a rose
hahaha
xp

but you DO want a rose aint you??xp

a tiring. tiring day...

2007-02-11T15:16:00.000+08:00

heyho!
just back frm signature hunt...^^
well, its an event 4 asean scholars.. like, the juniors begging the seniors for their signatures!!! haha... usually it'd be a kinda revenge-taking in between the seniors.. like, this morn, know (my thai fren frm 4e7.. she's so pretty caaannn!!! hahaha) was stding far frm me, then she asked my junior (cindy..3e4) to pour some powder on my hair.. sheesh.. my hair became white lidat.. but too bad dat she nv give her much powder, so it's only a bit of my head kena that powder

hahaha
and ya, aft that.. i did give her some lesson!! hahaha i asked her to pour a solution to know.. btw, i called this solution a SUPER MIXTURE!! hahaha.. it was so superb ya know what..
ok, i tell you ah.. it was the mixture of water, pva glue and...um.. my hair gel! hahaha it's damn sticky.. hahaha but cuz im so nice, so i added water, and it was only a bit sticky..xp when i told know, hui ching and all them, they gave me same reaction..."EWWW..." haha.. and when my junior asked me abt the compound.. hahaha (it was green colour..) i said, it's not "eww.." it'sjust that the fact that we mixed it with glue makes it become "eww" hahaha...^^ and so i made a "booth" wif hui ching and wan mei (malaysia), since they din bring anything.. hahaha ya, and finally i got dunked into the sea!!!!
well, its a long story..
my juniors n my frens were trying to make me wet.. but they know im too heavy to carry, so..i nv get thrown into water!!!=) well, actually i enjoy being thrown into the sea.. it's cool.. haha since the day was damn hot..^^ but, umm..i just wanted to see how long does it take 4 them to throw me into the sea.. haha
so finally, i din get thrown at all....
and so, hui ching, wan mei, know and i threw ourselves into the sea!!! like, we ran into that endless water supply! hahaha it's called "get thrown into the sea in gracious manner" by know.. as the others were usually carried by 5 ppl to throw into the sea..xp but last yr i got thrown!!!!>< it was damn scary cann... til i was like fell down to the sand 1st and all that.. but it was fun!!!!><

oh and, i so happy since it was a reunion wif my other frens in other hostel..
zippy! candice!!! all filipino scholars!!! thai scholars!!! viet scholars!!! happy to see you againnn!!! hahaha

=D
and i got all wet, frm head to toe... and my back was scratched by some sand my junior put inside my shirt.. damn smarting!!!!><
it got into my br* as well...-.-" ok and umm... finally the signature hunt ended and we got another project!!!
frm feb to march, we're gonna practise the dance using the song 'paperboy' by dunno who sings it. but i hope we're gonna perform well
hahahhaa=D

so, ya....
it's so tiring...

o levels...

2007-02-09T21:31:00.000+08:00

well, whos gonna like o levels..??
just now the school announce abt their o lvl achievements 4 last year...
mannn
damn good siao.... my prc senior got 9a1s...!!!! then my two indo seniors got 7 4their l1r5..specially teppy, stephanie valentina..it was 6a1s and 2a2s...
she was scared it she's move out of rjc..i hope she wont n i think she wont..^^
and long time havent seen them!!!

i was like, aaahhh!!! i miss you!!!! (so gay duh..hahhaa) but anws, i was like, stressed, seeing their result..afraid of my unability to do better....
and tendency to do worst..><

i need some DETERMINATION i guess.. hahaha

oh then, i got my malay Os..
it was a2.. ok la, but im not content enough..
i should get a1 for my malay cann...it wasnt that difficult, the paper, i mean...
i was like, oh ok...-.- but anyway, im still happy!!! hahaha=)
im happy happy happy!
at least i didnt do bad..!!!!=D

and umm other thing.. i miss my grandma in indonesia.. i usually call her OMA (pronounce it as: O-MA)..ha3 usually ppl say its popo or sth. but oma is in e language dutch! dunno y my fam use some dutch words in our confersation..but i guess it's cuz of e places my parents were born..which were colonialised by the dutch back in 1600s to 1900s...so, ya. sometimes my fren got confused cuz of the words i use arent like usual words in bahasa. woahh.. i sounded like an ang mo.. hahhaa
jokes jokes!!! dun take it seriously..
that means you got low self-esteem..
hahaha
xp

well, i guess that's enough for today...=D
cant wait for vday!!!!

it's a thursday.. a very thursday...

2007-02-08T19:39:00.000+08:00

well, today i experience 2 things..
a good thing and bad thing...
well lets start evrything wif the good one!!=)
during assembly, there was this person, talking abt success..
he was so funny!!!
hahaa
i kept laughing like crazy, n i guess nt only me
the whole sch was like, laughing til their chins almost dropped
hahahhaa=)
well
suddenly i dun have the mood to talk abt it.. hahaha
for sure, he was like very interesting!! wif all the voices.. sounds funny.. haha
and i just realised that i had to do sth on my study... on my school stuff..
i must study
umm
not only study.. i must WANT it.. DESERVING like no one ever do more...

because...
i just got my bio paper.. i failed....><
i was like, omg... i cant believe it...!!!! you know what.. i've failed badly this term!!!! really, really badly!! worse than last year...

I DID STUDY... STUDY HARD...for few days..myb for ppl's std, i didnt study that hard.. but i noe myself, i studied as hard as b4 fye...-.-
and it's just making me even more depressed....that i couldnt find anything 2 beg 4 mark frm ms yong..-.- then suddenly this fren of mine wanted 2 take a look at my paper..i gave her.. while she was looking at it,

i was so angry... i smashed the wall... few times... well, till my knuckles were like, swollen..(but aft half an hour it got smaller, a bit..)and bruised.. for sure..
i was depressed.. dunno wat to do...
then evrybody was goin 4 recess, i think there were just me n that friend,the 2 of us (oh, and i 4got to tell ya, she's one of ppl i trust most in this whole world.. beside my fam n my friend in indo) inside our class... or my wif some other ppl but i didnt look at them..
we were talking like, omigosh.. i was so angry n i couldnt relax at all..
she was trying to comfort me, but ya.. exactly aft she had asked me sth (i guess she asked me whether i felt like crying or sth..) i cried.. suddenly it was like, my tears just flow down lidat...like, cannot stop cann.. i was trying to laugh.. but ya.. still cried..
the worst thing is,

i made my friend cried also..
i made you cried..
i'm sorry...
deeply sorry..

yea, i now regret hitting the wall..
actually i dont do that, it's only when i cant stand my anger anymore, then i hit the wall.. only 2 times in my life.. the other one was last year.. oh, myb b4, but i nv hit the wall, i did worst i guess...myb cuz i usually keep things inside. like, what i tell ppl abt my feeling is often nt true..

but i really thank you..4 listening to all my craps..^^ you've done all you can to listen to me... thou i noe im boring..
im nt mentioning the name, i noe u noe who i mean
thx ya...=)
i'll keep my promise.

mushy mushy mushy!!!

2007-02-06T16:36:00.000+08:00

chem chem chem
im now bombarded wif all those chemical formulae..
and qualiltative analysis
nt to forget the ammonia
haber process
i screwed it...-.-

...
oh btw, lets nt talk abt sth nt good.. today's netball was like fun!! hahaha^^
i was like trying to defend jackie n sherlyn..^^ sherlyn was like damn funny cann... shes like a walking tv show.. woahahahhahaha...^^
oh and charmaine, sherlyn was so bad.. like bullying cham2..
charmaine!!! next time must go wif me.. u'll be even more bullied.. muahahahhaa
^^

hahahahhhh
btw, im now crazy of the song
ALL OUT OF LOVE by OTT or HUMAN NATURE or AIR SUPPLY!!!!!!
sooo nice cannn?? thou the song is like, so old and myb a bit mushy....
i love it i love it i love it!!!^^ (well..dunno y, recently im crazy of those mushy love songs.. hahahhh^^)

I'm all out of love
I'm so lost without you
I know you were right
Believing for so long
I'm all out of love
What am I without you
I can be too late
To say that I was so wrong

I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
I know you hurt too but what else can we do
Tormented and torn apart

I wish I could carry your smile in my heart
For times when my life seems so low
It could make me believe what tomorrow could bring
When today doesn't really know, doesn't really know

I'm all out of love
I'm so lost without you
I know you were right
Believing for so long
I'm all out of love
What am I without you
I can be too late
To say that I was so wrong

I want you to come, come and carry me home
Away from these long lonely nights
I'm reaching for you , are you feeling it too
Does the feeling seem oh so right

And what would you say if I call on you now
And say that I can't hold on
There's no easy way it gets harder each day
Please love me or I'll be gone, I'll be gone

I'm all out of love
I'm so lost without you
I know you were right
Believing for so long
I'm all out of love
What am I without you
I can be too late
To say that I was so wrong

What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?
What are you thinking of?

I'm all out of love
I'm so lost without you
I know you were right
Believing for so long
I'm all out of love
What am I without you
I can be too late
To say that I was so wrong

a super,super duper tiring day..^^

2007-02-04T19:39:00.000+08:00

i just had dinner, yeah after i had gone pway..

guess what, i met mrs capel-ms rosalie- in dining hall!!!^^ so happy since i havent met her having dinner in hostel 4 quite long time already...><
and it was kinda lame, we talked abt maid.duh...
esp indonesian maid. like how to treat the maid or sth.. hahahahhahhh^^
i think shes gonna employ a maid in july or sth...^^
ohhh cant wait til moses is born!!!><

ok then
pway
i went n settled some stuff for vday...^^
some stuff for my dearest n stupidest jackie.. hehehhee
so that means, half of the things for vday are settled!!!
i gt draw n go some places...^^

fun fun fun
tired tired tired!!!!

these few days..^^

2007-02-03T15:57:00.000+08:00

..
i went orchard. ate at tembuah mas indo restaurant.. at paragon..wif nadia, kathy, fiona, dana, jelly n snad..
it was fiona's bday..
the tahu telor was so nicenice cann?? (it's tofu fried wif egg..just so u noe, tahu means tofu, n telor is "telur", or egg..^^)..oh and i ate so many stuff!!!
-dendeng (beef..with some dunno wad "seasoning"..hard but nice..^^)
-squid, small ones
-kangkung belacan!!! ...i like! ilike!!!
-ayam goreng!!! i love it..cuz it's ayam kampung (kampong chicken..??-.-" sounds weird.. duh.. hahaha).. healthy n just nice! hahaha
-sop buntut n soto (tail soup n soto.. i ate the soto n only the soup of sop buntut..the soup so nice!)
-and for the dessert, we all ordered es teler (avocado,coconut,jackfruit n ice in coconut milk!!!^^ so nice yet so fattening...)..long time havent eaten such things like this!!!!
..well, actually it wasnt really nice compared wif if we eat in indonesia!! much more spicy n tasty!! hahahahhh...^^

then it was quite funny since while eating we kept singing, "coconut is a very nut, if you eat too much, you'll get very fat!".. ha3 n each of them pointed fiona when they reached the word, "fat"..ha3..damn funny..^^ oh, except nadia... thx 4 pointing me n made me more conscious that i had eaten too much..-.-
oh btw, abt nadia,ytd was the 1st time i really talked to nadia since the school reopens...so poor thing..-.-
ok, anwys, kat n i n fiona gt rush back 2 e hostel since we cant miss the match!!!
capt's ball match!

last night i just played against dunman high ppl...
man, they were damn rough...-.- i got bruises, sprained on both ankles..
then my epidermis was like peel off.. (woahahaha.. wad a language..xp)
oh, my arm got bleeding a bit.. my fore finger is swollen..-.-

and we still won!! hahaha^^ happy happy happy!!!=)
but it's a damn sad fact that we'll befriend them for the intra hostel competition..-.- i was hoping to be in one team wif my tjc seniors.. myb karina or julianti ("auntie") or fenny (my "mommy").. hahaha i hope they're playing also...-.- and.. i was a bit angry during the game, but i successfully released my anger by waving to my friens supporting us last night..^^ like, kiss-byes, waving and all that..pretending that i was a miss universe, or america's next top model, or indonesian idol or i dunno, ms.president?? hahaha^^ for sure, by doing such things.. i felt muchmuchmuch better!!! and kathy was like, "what? duhh...-.-" wif that weird gaze at me.. hahahhh i noe it, i noe it.. she got confused la..^^ and btw, she played quite well, too!!! thou all of us didnt play well ytd, evryone was too tired and too affected by the opponents' team...gees, they practised really hard.. siao la... like, evryday, and the teacher was like, keeping his eyes on us evrytime we practised.. like, looking 4 our weaknesses and all that...

btw, i didnt really concentrate in the game..my mind was out of the game in the 1st few minutes.. thinking abt the flood in jakarta... i was like, sooooo fed up by the news.. scared n worried of my family, and melsy ofcourse, and mba yuli (my maid.haha)
i couldnt reach them, aft the game.. i was scared.. then i suddenly called jackie..
ohwell, her voice always makes other feel better!! ^^ i felt much better. thx ya jackie.. thou actually my house is in the area that the flood usually nt happen..so when there's a flood, very high some more.. it's really scary..
but finally i could call indonesia this morning..n my mum told me that they all moved into an apartment... only 4 one month la..not forever. hahaha^^ n my pet dog also..melsy..so cute!! my mum said that she was like scared of this..til she couldnt bark at all..^^ til she reached the apartment and see the land..haha the ground.. then she was so excited..hahaha^^ i can imagine..^^

oh and..uhm...
today's very slack.. i went parkway to meet andrew (yeah... he's our project committe's president..) n he said he'd be late cuz of meeting, sudden meeting...-.- for 2 n half hours!!!-.- i was like, what the...??
ok la fine..i went ard pway, waiting for him...-.- then aft that he called again, n said that he'll b at pway at 1.. which is an hour later.. then finally, i went back to my hostel.. nt waiting 4 him anymore..
so i got my book wif me, went back to hostel n ate lunch wif my juniors n kat n fi..

oh!!! i 4got to tell 2 things!!!

1) is that this morning i ordered some roses in some florist in pway.. afraid if i cant get some during vday.. they're 4 my friends, of course, and i've thought of who to give..^^
hahahahhh.. oh and i asked the uncle selling the flowers (last time i bought roses frm the auntie, but dunno wad, my he's her husband or sth.. hohoho) whether i shud buy them e day b4 vday or just order n pay now, later just take..
then he said, better order now, cuz later the price of roses will go up to 5bucks each!!! wah lao... so i ordered la..^^aiyo.. lucky ppl la you all.. i so nice friend.. hahhahaha...^^ (time to praise myself..xp it's wad we call self-confidence..hehe)

OOT.. out of topic
on wednesday, i watched the inconvenient truth right.. then cham2 told me that jackie wants a ring 4 vday..i was superdupershocked.. when i heard that,...
JACKIE???
omg...-.- wad happened to her>????!!!! hahahh
then i was like, o ya, vday is coming soon..
so i asked jackie at night. like, wad she wants.. since i had asked cham2 that evening n she asked me to draw the pics of the 5 of us..it's kinda hard though..
ok, back to jackie, n unexpectedly, she asked me to buy a ring also!!!
well.. then the day aft,
cham2 measured the size of jackie's lil finger.. i was like, omigosh.. i'd planned all night long..like, to buy her the one for her lil finger..will look so nice there u noe...fine la, e day after, i decided to look for one for her ring finger.. yeah..where there's supposed to b the ring put on.. haha^^ so i asked jackie, like, oi, do u want me to engage u or to marry u?? ^^ crazy lols...=)
but anyways, at least i got her ring finger size already! hahaa^^ it was super embarassing since i measured it wif a thread...-.-
hahahh
oya!!!! almost forgot!!!
at 1st jackie asked us to give her 10rings..
sherlyn-2, charmaine-3 and jessica-5..
y 4 me so many???
soooooo bad...................................

im not even sure whether i'll get u one jackie..xp
hahaha^^

it's kinda confusing..

2007-02-02T16:54:00.000+08:00

well, now's post is damn short... myb 2nite or tmr post again.. longer.. hahahahh^^

time constraints... wanna go paragon eat dinner.. fiona's bday..

...
later i tell you. abt the audition thing also. hahahh

gtg now!
CYA!!!

^^
lalala... [sure i sounded like someone, aint i? hahahahhh]

..some random things..

2007-02-01T20:34:00.000+08:00

eh.. you know wad..marissa, this friend of mine in malay class, shes DJing in RIA 89.7FM radio!! hahaha..^^
so cool sia...

oh, and today..
i fell down for dunno how many times already..it's after skool...
i guess my ankle sprained...-.- painn....

ytd i washed jackie's pencil case!!! (sounds wrong isit??^^ well, it's basically i just cant stand it.. jackie so bad... nv take care of the pencil case frm me...-.- haha kidding la...^^)
now it's damn clean mannnn..^^ i so happy!
hahahahahahaha ytd i din find anythin fun to do..^^
oh i watched an inconvenient truth..^^

the film cool...
it's like, now i scared of global warming...

oh btw, it's sth like discovery channel film..
ya noe wad, at 1st i thot it was real movie la.. so i wanted to go for it..-.-

but its kae, anyway the movie was nice..^^
or i guess we'd better say it as a "presentation" rather than a movie..??

it's another day... againn...

2007-01-30T18:37:00.000+08:00

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Babe I miss you, you know

And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
I'm fine baby, how are you??
Well I would send them but I know that it's just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I'm lucky I know
But I wanna go home
I've got to go home

Let me go home
'Cause I'm just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life
It's like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
That this is not your dream
But you always believed in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel all alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I've had my run
Baby, I'm done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I'll be home tonight
I'm coming back home

home-michael buble

..

2007-01-30T18:33:00.000+08:00

wah lao.. bio n geog paper so damn hard cannnn..

eh
no. geog was okay la...
it's just that bio..
i hope i wont fail..-.-

oh btw btw btw...

i passed my physics!!! yayy!!! ya know wad, it seems like i so hopeless ya??.. like, only pass then i happy already.. but it's true
that super bright ms johara...
she purposely made the phy paper so difficult one..-.-

she even said that if we're smart, we should get b3..
that means she knows that it's difficult.. i think...-.-

btw
i so tired!
congratz to grace!!! u played so cute!!! hahaha
^^

random random random...

it's so tiring...and my dad..

2007-01-27T17:20:00.000+08:00

im back!!! frm e carwaxing..
and parkway!! hahahhh
i just bought 2 movies..
hahahhh

the village-i guess it's damn cool!! hahahhhh
titanic.. ok i noe its super embarassing.. but ya, i nv watched it..-.-
last time it was released when i was primary one or two.. dunno.. and my mum didnt allow me to watch.. thou ive actually been crazy abt movies since playgroup.. hahahhh n when i was pri one, my dad took me to movies at least once a wk..^^
it's kinda funny thou.. omigosh.. now i start to miss my dad..^^
oh ya, n when i told my mum i wanna watch it. she said, "no.. it's 17 and above"
she was just kidding actually, but as a 7 yr-old-nice-daughter, of course i finally din watch titanic... and yeah.. until now..-.-

hahahhh^^

oh, talking abt my dad n i when i was 3 or sth..
he used to take me to the zoo almost evry weekend.. hahahhh since he din seem so busy.. like, evry sat n sunday.. and i know it's quite far frm jakarta
hahahaha like, slightly farther than pasir ris-boon lay???... sth like that
esp when my mum went abroad for her work, that was wad my dad always did for me.. and my younger sis was just 1,5 years old!! so.. ya...^^

and he brought me to the waterfall in the zoo.. it's quite far frm the parking area
and evrytime i got tired, he carried me on his shoulder... and i was quite heavy... i think.. hahahaha n we went into the forest.. walking along the track...=)
what i still remember until today is just the bridge near the waterfall.. i love the bridge.. and we climbed up the rocks, and i was so happy evrytime i saw that super duper high waterfall...
it's kinda sweet memory wif my dad...=)

now i miss him
he's so nice cann...??^^
thou i know you wont get to read my blog, but
i love you dad..=) you're the best dad in the world...

cny song!!

2007-01-24T19:20:00.001+08:00

heya heyya heyya!!!!
i so happy 2day since we've finally finished our chinese new year song!!!
well.. let me tell u abt it e next post, since now is almost prep time.. hahahhh

oh btw, i now can play e intro of only hope by mandy moore..^^ ohohoh.. and until the part just b4 e chorus..
i sooooo happy!!!
and im really sorry that i kept asking jackie not to play the song b4 i can play only hope..-.-
well, it's basically cuz i noe u also like the song, so i want to play it for you...
no other reason.. ya.. i mean, all the show offs and all that..it's not because of that..
i just wanna play this song la.. erm.. for myself also, hahahhh, but more for this friend of mine..^^ it's something like that.. hahahahhh but finally i realised, n decided to surrender the score for her la.. it's part of the exchange with the class fund.. hahahahhhh^^

sorry yah jackie...=.=
Jessica

oh, btw, i reallyreallyreally wanna b able to play only hope.
really want.
hahahahhhh =)

im longing for a holiday..

2007-01-22T18:59:00.000+08:00

im longing for a holiday
im waiting for a holiday
im dreaming of a holiday

im sorry yeah, seems like these few days ive been posting abt tiredness..
or sth close to that...

really, i feel like that

i think i need more sleep at night, so that im nt gonna sleep in the class anymore..
or at least, i nt gonna daydream in class anymore..

wad i do is burdening me.. like, 1000kg or i dunno how heavy.
hahahh..

oh ya.
IMPORTANT.. XP
i 4got to tell ya, when last sunday i went to lyn's church right..
at the end of e service, the pastor asked abt whose family isnt here with us..
then i raised my hand lo.. n the person next to me asked me if she can pray for me..
haha i feel so funny, then i told her.. like, actually im here to study. so im in spore alone n that's y my fam nt here.. and she got confused of wad to pray.. haha
so i guess finally she prayed 4 me to be strong..^^ thx auntie..=)

but then, it made me feel even more homesick!!!>< i wanted to cry man... i did really feel homesick..
so when suddenly lynette came to me aft dat, then i was like, omg....>< sheesh man..
i really cried.. (though only a little.. hahahh cuz i kept talking to myself nt to cry...at least, not to cry in front of evrybody... hahahahha)

oh and i realise, that now i've got family here..
at 1st, you know wad.. i was so scared if i wouldnt get any friends here.. esp the "non-scholars", if you understand wat im saying..>< really sorry, but it's wad i felt exactly last year.. during obs, as i recall.. even at night, when evrybody was sleeping already, i asked jackie sth abt "what she thinks abt the scholars" and "my fear".. sth like that..hahah actually i nv ever b willing to talk abt stuff like that to anybody.. but then i dunno how, it was just blurted out of my mouth.. hahahhh
it's like, never been that honest to my friend b4. hahahh but now, i know that it's not right.. and i nv ever imagine that i got wat we call "friends" here..
oh, out of topic ya.. btw, if i have friends.. or i have befriended someone,i'd treat them real seriously..my real friends.. and that's what makes me a damn boring person la..and usually my friends just walk away.. yeah..
oh ok, back to topic..
its not that ive forgotten abt my fam in indonesia. of course i still love them A LOT, and they irreplaceable (beyonce. hahaha) it's just that now i feel that i have a second home..oh no. a home.^^ it's my friends here.. umm... im not mentioning the names but i guess you know it..^^ (u noe, it's sth deeper.. as in, no need to mention the name.. hahaha can feel it?)
thx to you all..
really, really thanks.. i feel like home..
hahahhh
^^ i love you guys.=)

a hard days night..

2007-01-21T18:47:00.000+08:00

a hard days night..

eh
seems like an old song?? a hard days night.. the beatles.. hahahahh isit?? isit?
thou i dun really no how the song sounds like...-.-

oh well... just this morn i went to lynette's church.. hahahhh...
lynette was super dao..xp no la. kidding.. shes not dao at all.. hahaha lynette so nice what.. esp when there was sum1 offering a choco cake! hahah^^

and um.. then i went parkway... buying some bday present for sherlyn!!! sherlyn! u must be happy hor...

nah, that's all..
i think the interesting part of my blog was e ytd's post.. hahahhh

so many things to do..:
1) art club thing... canteen 2007..
2) hw that i have yet to finish..-.-
3) treasurer jobs for the recycling box thingy...
4) buy some files..
5) collecting class fund..
6) some cny thing
7) class deco
8) write some song..indon song..
9) cip...

so many stuff to do...-.-

im tired. bored. scared. and im homesick.

wattaday

2007-01-20T20:53:00.000+08:00

oh well.. pfff.. (a signal of feelin tired..)

nth much i do today...-.- it's just a cip..
asean scholars cip stuff.. car washing, car waxing..
it was damn tiring.. not cuz of the job.. but it's that i did it for almost 8 hours..-.-
well.. there's this group called scholars to you.. s2u.. which will b doin cip.. fund-raising for we-share-care..like, an organisation for child abuse.. umm.. and we split to few groups.. doin the thingy..^^
it was real fun...!!!!
at 1st i wanted to do the 1st shift.. wif my juniors (devina, lisa, vebi sum thai juniors n cindy), frens (belle, chanya etc), batchmate.. hahahhaa oh and not to forget andrew, our president who has been working real hard for this project.. thanks yah!!^^ we met at pasir ris.. and took a bus frm there..and got lost.. hahahahhh
it was quite funny though, we almost got into the wrong bus.. then aft we stopped, jaywalked, then went ard the blk..looking 4 blk 210.. then he called jonathan, e wesharecare person, and guess what, it was blk 251 instead of 210!! crazy if we wanna walk passing 40 blocks.. hahahhh but finally we walked ard n ard... back to the same place, then went ard other blk and back to the initial place, so tiring man.. and the fact that we were already late made me feel even more stressed..but finally, aft a long way goin, we found it!!!^^ and started to do cip..

it was damn boring, since there were only 6 cars in the 1st shift...-.- and we ended the shift a bit faster cuz it started to rain...-.- and jonathan was so nice that he sent us wif his van..to the mrt..^^ and we ate lunch in mcdonald's...oh and andrew said that he might be doin the 2nd shift alone since many ppl finally not goin to the 2nd shift..cuz of the rain..-.- so i offered 2 go wif him.. ya..n luckily, there were other 5 volunteers frm chij toa payoh (valencia, ayu, and many others..since i 4got their names.. hahah sorry ya)..we doin only 2 cars, n even one of them was the car we had done b4.. its just that cuz of the rain, the car gone dirty again..-.-
n we did perfect job!!!^^ it was great man..^^ our work was real perfect.. til the inside part of the car became clean also...=) and the owner was obviously satisfied.. i so happy!! hahahaha....

so..at last, i went home with a body lack of energy.. lethargic..-.-
and i took bath.. and when i was washing my hair.. the alarm rang so loudly.. like, fire alarm.. i was like, omg! wat happened??!! but i thought it was just like the fire drill at school..-.- or at dunman high hostel the prev years... so i was like, ahhh no need to go downstairs..hahaha i called know (my thai friend frm 4/7) and asked her whether we needed to go down or not..and so i didnt go downstairs..^^
but then suddenly the alarm rang again.. nv stopped..and got announcemnt dat we gtg downstr..

finally, ms rosalie told me that there was some tip off of the electricity..-.-
luckily, it wasnt so badly occured..-.- so .. ya.. i went upstairs again.. aft some time, and ate dinner wif my junior.. instant mee,though.. it's nt healthy ya..but it's the life of hostel ppl..hahaha only got microwave.. so always eat instant stuff..-.- its some kinda risk of living alone.. hahaha (craps..ooh..)

so now i feel so full!!!^^
hahahhh
and tired.. so i go online! and met jackie!
and shes so bad.. dun wanna tell me her height...-.-
i got even more angry with ya, jackie...

feelin now:
tired. restless. sleepy. happy

it's a new day.. hahahh

2007-01-18T20:42:00.000+08:00

i went to art club this evening.. and um... we did clay making!!!
omigosh!! it's sooo nice!!!!^^
..
you know what, i made that container for sweets.. it somehow has a form of a cat, with the paws some more! haha

and the person who taught us was ms teo from lasalle.. she told us some basics of ceramics making.. like they gonna heat the processed clay in 1000 degree celcius.. or even more.. woah.. so hot man... like, it takes up one day for the clay to be dried into ceramic...
and i just cant wait how my sweets container would look like!!!^^
cant wait! cant wait!!

oh butbutbut i dunno wat i donna do with it.. myb just put it on my desk.. hahaha

this noon, i went eating lunch with charmaine n jackie againn..
ahh,i havent told you.... ok..ytd i was supposed to go bio remedial.. and i came late..>< i went eating lunch in some place near our school. it's only abt 40 or 50m walk frm side gate of school.. but dunno wad the place's name is..-.- oh and i ate chicken rice ytd.. it was nice..though not nicer than lucky chicken rice!! hahahh i still think that lucky chicken rice is the best of all chicken rice in singapore!^^ oh btw, it's in lucky plaza,2nd floor.. umm.. orchard road, near tangs..haha im some kind of promoting the restaurant..^^
oh ya, back to this aftnoon... i went there, at 1st we wanted to eat duck rice.. but then, the duck rice is finished AGAINN!!! (at 1st, ytd we also wanted to eat duck rice).. so i was like.. damn it... so finally we ate char siew rice..hahahhh.. i think it was nicer than the chicken rice.. ahh dunno leh..-.- myb cuz i still prefer that lucky c rice.. haha

oh today's malay is fun mann... we played congkak (which in bahasa is congklak, if u dunno).. cuz cikgu wasnt there.. and guess what, i beat fezra!!! hahaha.. at 1st she was like, "kalah! kalah! jessica kalah!" (meaning: jessica must lose! sth like that)
but then i won her... quite far some more.. am i skillful or its just my luck? hahahh

eh, have i told you before abt the ss ca?? i wrote down jackie's name on her question paper.. and accidentally i wrote it wrongly.. hahahh like jaqueline instead of jacqueline..>< sorry yah jackie.. but you also hafta say sorry cuz you wrote my name wrongly also!!! both words some more...
im not jesika ardaylia.. actually ppl always mistook my ardelia.. so it's fine.. but i cannot tahan the jesika one!!!! AAARGHH.. RAWWRRRRR.... my jessica is
jessica frm jessica simpson
jessica frm jessica alba
and jessica the brand of a tailor
hahahaha
^0^ so in conclusion, im angry wif ya.. jackie.. my dear jackie...><

ok.. then.. wat else??
oh! i screwed the emaths test!!! sheesh............ i got 29 upon 40!!><
i did almost cry.. or did i cry a little?? but i feel stressed.. esp since my 1st test was 7.5 upon 15...
omigosh...-.- what happened to me????!!!!

i thought after the new year i'd feel better abt evrything in my life.. but then.. evrything is outta control... i dunno what happened to me.. my mind.. my brain.. and evrything...

so, feelin now:
happy. confused. stressed.

another day

2007-01-16T17:06:00.000+08:00

...
...
...

and it's another day again

so fast
why?

i'm scared of this life
of this uncertainty of life

and the caterpee(^0^) has grown to butterfly
mature..??

and it's the life i have to face up
can i survive?
can i survive?
replayed again and again and again just like the old song

...
now that summer has come..
the second season of my journey...
and it's tough..
like the scorching sun...
but i gotta survive..

and i will..

another day has come

call me a selfish girl..

2007-01-15T18:33:00.000+08:00

it's just me
myself
and i

and a selfish girl
looking at the mirror.. glazing deeply into her own eyes
picturising the mess she made...

and a selfish girl
wants the world just for herself
cannot bear of losing anything

even her friends
she'll never let go

she wants the world
all the dazzling city, crowded of people dancing
full of cheer.. and the beautiful birds singing
it's only for her own

she keeps feeling afraid of losing what she got
afraid of losing what she has had for many century
even shes afraid of losing the stars that she never had

and a selfish girl
meet a guy. of her dream.
the whitehorse prince in the snow white
the lovable prince of the mermaid
it's just too high. too good to be true

and a selfish girl
realised that shes gonna lose one of her favourite soon...
dunno what to do.. just smile
maybe this time mustnt be selfish anymore??

and a selfish girl, who is now trying not to be selfish anymore
dreams again.

2007-01-15T18:23:00.000+08:00

After i realised
i'm not the best that's in your heart
I cant witness
that it's that person who understands you
Not me

Now forgive me
If now i become mute in front of you
It's not that I feel uncomfortable nor i feel strange
it's just that my heart is limited to understand you
forgive me

Although i still love you
I got to leave you
I got to forget you

Though my heart still loves you
My soul still needs you
I have to let you go

And it's only you
who's able to understand me
but it's the other who's able to flatter you
and not me

("bukan diriku" -- "Not Me" by Samsons)

woahh.. the lyrics so deep...^^
i love this song...!!!!
oh btw, it's an indonesian song.. really nice song.. i just tried to translate it
hahaha

a long and windy day..0.o

2007-01-11T19:39:00.000+08:00

i came back frm sch quite late today.. got art club..-.- must prepare for e cca promo day...

a busy day....

nah.
suddenly feel nt like blogging anymore..-.-

..

2007-01-10T19:25:00.000+08:00

heyya.. blogging again..
these few days have been such a wonderful time for me.. yeah..^^

tho im now is damn busy cuz of art club thing la... and i often got mood swing at school.. hahahhh

oh and, i felt reallyreallyreally bad...-.- abt the thing just happened this aftnoon...
you know wat, when i was getting into the bus 196 frm parkway, i met this lady.. abt 30yrs old.. she was asking the busdriver abt how to go kallang mrt.. n i felt so bad that i know how to go kallang... take 196 first then change to 12.. or simply take 197..(but i forgot abt 197 that time).. then the bus driver said, that 31 goes to kallang mrt.. but i wasnt very sure abt it la.. but then i kept quiet.. thot the bus driver should know better than me.. and i was badly confused of what to do.. like, cannot think so fast..-.- until when the bus went off.. i was full of this miserable feeling.. i should have told that woman...-.- ya, though i really forgot abt no.197, but i should have told her abt changing bus frm 196 to 12..-.- omigosh... i feel guilty...-.- but then now i cant regret it anymore.... i hope that woman would finally find kallang mrt in no time..><
i'm sorry, ms.. i was really confused...(if only she can read my blog.. hahah)

..
..
change topic! its not so nice to talk abt it over and over again...-.-
oh, i went parkway to upd8 my passbook.. then i went searching for a bday present for my friend..^^ a good friend on mine whose bday is next month n i mistook it.. i thot it was next week....-.-
sheesh.... i bought the present already..-.- i totally forgot.. so now i just hafta keep the present til next month to be given to her...^^

oh next week is my senior's bday!!! but i must look for some more bday present then..since my other senior's bday was just last week n i forgot to buy her a present...-.- got no time... was stayin out wif my auntie... ok la, wish me get the present soon kae!!!^^

ganbatte ne!!!

a song by glenn fredly...

2007-01-09T19:32:00.000+08:00

im now crazy of this song againnnn!!! an indonesian song, by glenn fredly entitled "jejak langkah" (the footprints).. cuz of someone whos sitting rite beside me and accidentally reminded me of this sad song....>< i may not be present in your sweet night dreams

i may be over, become the memory that you'll never be proud of
but for me, the love is a treasure that i'll always keep

the footprints that you left has led me into maturity
the footprints that you left will never be erased
and that's my love for you

although you came into my sincere love for a short while
but it's really precjous, becomes the memory which i'll always be proud of
and so for me the love is a treasure that i'll always keep

goodbye my dear
find a much better person
don't be so troubled of all the promises that you made for me that time

golly.. the song's lyrics so deep right???

...

2007-01-08T19:15:00.000+08:00

hey...blogging againn!!! hahaha
well basically i felt really terrible today..
depressed some more...-.- no exact reason..

oh ya..
just remember.. i felt terribly sorry for cham2 n lyn abt the lunch thing... real sorrie..

and i suddenly feel nt like blogging again..
omigosh
im so mood swing...-.-

oh, and jackie...

...

heyya

2007-01-04T19:10:00.000+08:00

im blogging againn!!!^^
just for info, im feeling damn tired rite now.. cuz of the rain, and of the art club work... hahahhh...^^
ya know, we were working so hard 4 the promotion day.. me, julia n jael...^^
we three stayed back in e art room, doin some sort-of-banner til 5.40... hahah
it was tiring though...

well. i think that's all...
oh, and i ytd, the 1st day of skool!!

..
it reminds me of exactly last year...^^ when i was in the hall... looking at evry corner of the hall cuz i couldnt catch whatever the teacher said...
and when i was talking to my first singaporean friend.. hahahh.. so funny... kept saying "Hah?" for many times, til she said "ok la nevermind..." hahaha
it was quite funny, when i knew that this person became my lab partner..and it's like, i always met her evrywhere since our index no. is near.. hahahhh
i was like, "oh my.. malu...."
but anyway, i really thank that person since she was so patient..like, always wait for me and repeat whatever sentence i couldnt catch.. hahah...
.. and she helps me a lot, with my assignments, my problems... yeah... always listen...^^
thx so much for you! (you surely know who you are..^^)

oh then...
what else.. oh, ive got that problems of memorising my frens' name.. hahahah
now not anymore...^^

3 wishes for this year..
I. i will get good marks on my o levels
II.i will improve on my eq
III. will be closer to ppl around me.. esp my family n my frens

well.. seems so hard to achieve..
i'll try...^^

the school starts...

2007-01-02T20:38:00.000+08:00

happy new year '07!!!!

im glad that we've passed the super busy year of 2006..
but also scared, knowing the fack that we'll be busier due to o'levels this year!!!
-.-

and for the holiday, it was just great..^^ i went so many places... like, shopping malls in jakarta...
oh, bandung, the city of factory outlets.. (i got many tees there! haha)
indramayu... a city in west java where my grannys live...^^
and umm... surabaya!!! oh my, it was jux great since it was the 1st time i went to surabaya
...
tiring and exhausting some more
hahaha
but i njoy the holiday after all..!!!!
and it's jux making me sick that we're supa dupa busy this year
....
i mux strive hard...^^
for my own good, yeah...

then
the school starts..

it's late at nite..

2006-12-24T02:19:00.000+08:00

you know what... it's 1.30am and what im doin is just chatting wif jackie...
talking abt some random stuff
hahahhahaa
well, that's all for today
since i dont have any mood to talk abt my grandma's house and abt my trip to bandung.. hahaha
nites!!!
Je-A

oh well...

2006-12-18T18:03:00.000+08:00

i was smuggled into my old skool and they were having an xmas celebration..^^
well, my teachers knew i was there too!! and they never scolded me, since i greeted them one by one, and i was thick faced in front of them.. haha
even my x-principal let me join them wif the xmas service and show and all that... haha
oh, i was surprised that many of my frens join the drama club!! haha
and the musical was just nice, even though i think theyre acting nt as good as someone i know, haha

oh and
tmr im hanging out wif them!!! it's the second time i guess, last week i did too
but this time, they said they goin to take some family pictures there.. haha im so glad that they still consider me as their family^^
and i feel guilty that i din really keep in touch wif them during sept holidays... and i guess i "forgot" them for some time...though they still care of me, and theyve been so nice to me this whole yr..^^ if nt cuz of them, i wouldnt have any frens here in indonesia...^^
and im nt going to leave them again...not anymore...
i feel really terrible abt it...like,how can i be so bad...

and i realised, that all my frens, no matter where they are, singapore or indonesia..
theyre just like my second home..^^

a song

2006-12-05T11:02:00.000+08:00

hahahahh..
begin evrything wif a smile!!^^

well it's kinda boring here..
since my sis is at skool then ive got nth to do...-.- i miss singapore.^^
and ive always wanted to write a nu song... but i just nv have the idea of what to write...-.-
i guess its just that the atmosphere here is nt for a song writing. hahah

aaarrrghhhh..............

-random-

2006-12-04T00:55:00.000+08:00

well.. it's quite late already, n what ive been doin is just chatting!!! hahaha wif jackie n mario..^^

dunno wat to say.
hahah

i'm missing you

2006-12-01T09:41:00.000+08:00

feeling so restless
dozens of pictures of you in my mind
i'm waiting for you
i'm waiting for you

feeling so lonesome at night
waiting for your phone call
waiting for your promises long ago
i'm broken

and evrytime i see you from far
i remember the old times
you looked at me and a smile
oh, it's over

and now that time has changed
it wont come back
so i gotta move on
jux keep the past as a good memory you'll never forget
then after i accept it, i'll learn how to be strong
cuz i've been such a fool
without decision, without bravery
and i gotta break my rules
i gotta break my rules
but i'm still missing you